Whoosh! And Lena, when you get to Enchantment, I'll kick you a few more times and then make you do my bidding to control all businesses in this town. Just think of me as the new Michael. But sleep with my sister, okay?
Lena missed out on a very generous signing
bonus by saying yes in 20 seconds instead of 5


Lena Kundera
on
ALL MY CHILDREN

September 24, 2003


100
(Lena appearance)
030924
Last update: 09/26/03


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PLAYERS
SYNOPSIS
RE-CAPS
ALL GAY RE-CAP
FASHION POLICE
PARODY
QUOTES
TRANSCRIPT
CLIPS



PLAYERS


Lena Kundera (Olga Sosnovska)
Kendall Hart




SYNOPSIS

Kendall gives Lena some tough love and a job at Enchantment



RE-CAPS:

From The Official Site at ABC.com:
http://abc.go.com/daytime/allmychildren/episodes/2003-04/20030924.html

Kendall is tough on Lena, telling her to stop feeling sorry for herself. Lena is shocked when Kendall offers her a job.

From About All My Children
http://allmychildren.about.com/cs/recaps/a/bl20030924r.htm

Kendall makes a call. She asks if she’s awake and talking, saying that she’s her sister, “Don’t let her go anywhere!”...

As Kendall starts into Lena’s room, a nurse insists she can’t go in there! Kendall snaps that she found that woman in there half dead and saved her life—that gives her some rights! She finds Lena sleeping, and loudly says it’s time to rise and shine and face the future! Lena groans, “My head!” Kendall asks if she’s got a little insect poison hangover working there? When she says she found her and saved her pathetic hide, Lena’s not sure she should thank her. She protests that her life wasn’t worth saving, and Kendall says she didn’t do it for her! Personally, she thinks she’s a selfish nothing, and she did it for Bianca. She says Lena’s always saying she loves her, and Lena insists she does. Kendall asks what if she hadn’t showed up, and what if Bianca was getting a phone call right now that her former lover had been toe-tagged and body-bagged? Does she call that shock therapy? Lena’s sorry, but she really didn’t know what else to do. Kendall asks if she really thought her death would help Bianca? Her sister doesn’t need one more horrible thing to obsess about when she can’t sleep at night, and she would carry that guilt around for the rest of her life, “What is wrong with you, Lena?” Lena bursts into tears, and Kendall tells her she’s got about 2 seconds to sob herself raw, and then it’s time to get it together and act like an adult! Lena agrees what she did was selfish, but all she could think about was what she did, and the effect her actions had on Bianca. She’s the one who brought Cambias to town, and she set the whole thing in motion, the rape, the pregnancy and the abortion; she’s going to carry that guilt to her grave. Kendall tells her to feel guilty if she wants to, but to carry the load and not leave Bianca to deal with her mess. It’s time for her to straighten up and fly right, and if Bianca finds it in her bottomless heart to forgive her, then more power to her; if not, then she should live with it! She tells Lena to put her clothes and her face on, and report to her office at Enchantment ASAP. When Lena says Erica will have her thrown out, Kendall informs her Erica doesn’t call the shots anymore—she does! Lena doesn’t understand, but Kendall tells her to pay attention, “You know what it takes to run Cambias and Enchantment, which I expect to run as soon as Alexander’s will hits probate. You’re going to be my right hand.” Lena asks, “You’re offering me a position?” Kendall says yes; they’ll discuss salary and benefits, and there will be a very generous signing bonus if she says yes in the next 5 seconds. Lena thinks people have the wrong idea about Kendall—they say she has no heart. When Kendall agrees she doesn’t, Lena calls her a liar. Kendall shrugs that she can think what she wants and starts to leave, but Lena tells, “You’re an amazing woman, as amazing as your sister, and I would be honored to work with you.”

From Soap Slut
http://pub18.ezboard.com/fsoapslutfrm2.showMessage?topicID=40.topic

Kendall is dismayed that Aidan no longer believes in her and plans to leave town. Later, she offers hospital-ridden Lena a bit of tough love and a job.




ALL GAY RE-CAP

This all gay recap is by C.K..
Read all the All Gay Re-caps at http://groups.yahoo.com/group/TheAllGayRecap/.

Lena parts are indicated in red for those who only want a Lena fix

TODAY ON ALL MY WUSSY CHILDREN:

  • Frosty*ss is still hanging.
  • Ryan shares the Fudgesicle with Edmund.
  • Kendall drills some sense into Lena.
  • Pine Valley's sauna is Ally McBeal's bathroom's poor cousin.
  • Suicide is just another word.
  • Greenlee and Juan Pablo aren't kissing cousins.

The Set-Up – At the Pine Valley Inn, Juan Pablo is trying to convince Greenlee to fly off with him to Milan; a friend of his, Andrea, will let them "have the run of the place" which, JP says, has a "spectacular view of the Alps. The Alps? In Milan? Are you joking?

Downstairs, Aiden admits defeat in the face of Kendall’s skills. Oh, and he’s leaving for a special assignment. You going to defrost Fudgesicle?

At the warehouse, Ryan talks to the Popsicle. *ssHat steals the scene.

At the penthouse, Erica asks David whether something went wrong during "Bianca’s procedure;" Bianca hears her name, walks out and wonders if David is there because of her. Didn’t you get the memo? It is all about Erica, all the time.


The Penthouse – David reassures Erica that "everything went the way it was meant to," which Erica believes to be an abortion, but we all know better.

Once Erica leaves, David reminds Bianca that "everything that happens at the clinic is privileged information."

David: "You know I adore your mother, but if you tell me it’s none of her business, then it’s none of her business."
Erica: "What’s none of my business?"

What is she, the bionic woman? And the fuh happened at the clinic? I can barely make myself care about Fudgesicle’s murder: I don’t think I can deal with another mystery without getting a lobotomy first.


The Warehouse – Edmund arrives, takes a look at *ssHat’s frozen body and thinks he might become a vegetarian. Ryan stops him from calling the police because "someone they like" might be the murderer and, come on, would it be fair to send that person to jail when Michael skated off? What’s the point of vigilantism if you muck it up with a conscience?


Pine Valley Inn Bar – Aiden thinks working Special Ops is a heck of a lot easier than living in Pine Valley and "getting shot in the back is more merciful" than trying to figure out who the bad guys are. Oh, you say that now and because you’re a Brit, but imagine having to carry out orders given by an empty-headed President. Just sayin’.

Kendall makes her voice tremble and asks him not to go.


Juan Pablo’s Suite – Greenlee never closes her eyes to things that excite her: must be why they’re shut when she kisses Juan Pablo. Mercifully, Mary knocks and interrupts them. They hide; she makes her way in with a pass-partout and is caught in flagrante delicto.

Greenlee: "Are you looking for something?"
Mary: "Well, yes, actually: I was looking for you."
Greenlee: "As petite as I am, I don’t think I would fit in the drawer."


Bwah ha! Hee, that’s funny.

Mary has something to say about Juan Pablo and no, he’s not her son.

After talk of dueling banjos delivered for the sole purpose of icking me out and alienating the Southern states – which could be a good thing should they ever decide to move away from Carnal Chin Chucks and graduate to hand-holding – Mary snatches Greenlee’s drink away and wonders just how much her daughter really knows about Guan Pablow, Snake Charmer.  Did Greenlee know that Guan Pablow met with Carlos behind closed doors? No, but she recovers and says she sent Carlos with a note. Was it a hall pass? Mary storms off.


The Penthouse – David recovers and says he and Bianca made plans to go to lunch together and Erica’s not invited. Erica buys it, of course, because this is the land of implausible stupidity, and thanks him for having remained close to her daughter.

Erica: "She really needs a man in her life."
Bianca: "Ah, mom?"


Erica didn’t mean it that way: she meant a man to be her friend, and not her you know what because Bianca is a…you know.

David hands Bianca some pills and is careful to cover the label with his man hands; Erica thinks they’re "an antibiotic to ward off post-operative infection," but we all know those a prenatal vitamins.


Pine Valley Inn Bar – Kendall thanks Aiden for having "watched her back" and for having kept her from "taking all [her] hate out on Michael." What? What about Fluffy?! He just – killed him, that bastard!

Kendall makes a call.

Kendall: "Yeah, hi, is she awake? I’m her sister. She is? She’s talking? Ok, don’t let her go anywhere."

Oh, don’t let Kendall’s quickie lie throw you off: with that warmth and sensitivity, she could only be referring to Lena.


The Warehouse – Ryan believes Kendall is the one who put Michael in the freezer, so he thinks they should just pretend to never have found him and walk out; Edmund, who might be pornorific but is not yet stupid, nixes the idea because Bianca might like to know *ssHat is covered in freezer burns. Walking out, Ryan stops to ponder whether the forensics team could pinpoint the day Michael was killed: that’s a good question, why is that log asking it? As far as I know, if a body is frozen fresh, then one cannot establish the time of death with any degree of certainty, something which I’m certain McHack is taking into consideration. Feh.


The Fair – Why is there no corn in a corn dog? Why is there no cotton in cotton candy? Why is there a recap for a scene with no meaning?


The Hospital – Kendall makes is past Nurse Ratchet and walks into Lena’s room.

Kendall: "Ok you: time to rise and shine and face the future."
Lena: "My head…"
Kendall: "Got a little insect poison hangover working there, huh?


Kendall, please: cut it out with the warm and fuzzies, would you?

Kendall: "You are something else, you know that Lena? You are something else. My life hasn’t exactly been an ice cream social lately but you don’t see me throwing myself a pity party, helping myself to a glass of arsenic on the rocks."
Lena: "My life wasn’t worth saving."
Kendall: "Yeah, well, I didn’t do it for you. Personally I think you’re a selfish nothing."

No compassion for the suicidal, no, no, no! We used all of that for Binky!  Speaking of which, you big wussy, get out of bed and brush it off, come on: think of Binky! That’s where the real pain is, you selfish Polish brat!

Lena: "Then why?"
Kendall: "Why the hell else do you think? I did it for Bianca. You’re always pouring your heart out, saying how much you love her."
Lena: "I do love her."
Kendall: "Then you had to prove how much you couldn’t live without her by trying to kill yourself? Lena, what if I hadn’t showed up? What if Bianca was getting a phone call right now that her former lover had been toe-tagged and body bagged? What do you call that, Lena? Shock therapy?"

I call that unrealistic: who the hell would have called Bianca?

Lena: "I didn’t know what else to do, I’m sorry."
Kendall: "Did you really think your death would help Bianca? Did you honesty think that? What is wrong with you? Like my sister doesn’t have enough horrible things going on in her life: she would definitely blame herself and she would carry that guilt around with her for the rest of her life. Like my sister needs one more horrible thing to obsess on when she can’t sleep at night. What is wrong with you, Lena?  [...]  You’ve got about two seconds to sob yourself rotten and then you know what? It’s time for you to get it together and act like an adult."


Kendall, honey, Lena doesn’t have the hiccups, know what I’m saying? You can’t just jump out from behind the corner and scare her out of her stupidity! Let’s be frank: Kendall has all the subtlety of, well, Erica, and she’s on the Bianca bandwagon now; she has not bought the breakup and she’s going crazy trying to make sure Lena will be a round once Bianca gets her head out of her *ss, so, yeah, she could be more sensitive, but Lena needs someone to shake her out of that torpor. We can talk ourselves hoarse about the fact that suicide wasn’t in Lena’s character until McTrash got her hands on her and we can debate whether suicide is the ultimate selfish act or whether Lena, to whom the fact that she’s neither wanted nor needed has been made perfectly clear by Bianca, Erica and Maggie, might have reason to think her death would not even be a blip on the screen. And none of us would be wrong – except for McTavish, who always is.


The Penthouse – David tells Erica that Aiden was the one who found her date book, but she shouldn’t worry because even Jack knows about it and decided to give her a free pass which, in this case, means not only that he’s the worst D.A. ever, but that he still wants to canoodle with Erica – or so Erica thinks.  David suggests that, instead of getting rid of it, Erica should fill it as if she’d had it all along. Wow, that’s brilliant, David: should she fill the entries for the days Aiden and Jack had it, too?


The Warehouse – The police arrive; Edmund shows them Popsicle and tells the Detective he was alone when he found it. You know, every time the camera closes in on Michael, I expect him to open his eyes and say "Boo!" Heh.

Oh, darn: just when we thought everyone in Pine Valley was incompetent, a forensics "expert" tells the Detective that there are two sets of fresh prints around *ssHat’s body.  Somebody?  Please care.


The Penthouse – David promises not to tell anyone what happened "that night" and asks Erica not to panic. I’m sorry, you two have met, right?


The Sauna –Ryan and a British guy meet in a cloud of pink steam to finalize "the big reveal." This is thoroughly engrossing, really, pay no attention to the fact that I’ve left a puppet in front of the TV.


The Hospital – Lena agrees with Kendall: what’s she’s done was "selfish."

Lena: "All I could think about was what I did, the effect my actions had on Bianca. I’m the one who brought Cambias to town: it’s my fault, it’s my shame."

What the fuh? Kendall brought Michael to town, not Lena! And it doesn’t matter, but how many revisions are there going to be? McTavish is a f***ing lunatic.

Lena: "I’m the one who set the whole thing in motion: the rape, the pregnancy, the abortion. I’m gonna carry that guilt to my grave."

Kendall, feel free to correct and stop Lena any time.

Kendall: "You’re not getting it Lena. Dead you’re not good to either one of us, you’re not good to anybody, especially Bianca. Not that I’m handing out a free pass: you want to feel guilty? Knock yourself out. But carry the load the way I have."

But, Kendall, Lena has already alienated everyone and there is no *ssHat left to marry!

Kendall: "From here on out, it’s time for you to straighten up and fly right and if Bianca finds it in that bottomless heart of hers to forgive you, then more power to her. If she doesn’t, then live with it.  Put your clothes on, get changed, put your face on and then report to my office at Enchantment ASAP."

Well, if the hiccup thing doesn’t work, muting into a drill sergeant will: come on, spit and polish your boots and get your *ss out of bed!  And forget therapy: therapy’s for birds!


Lena: "Erica will have me thrown out."
Kendall: "Erica doesn’t call the shots anymore: I do."
Lena: "I don’t understand."
Kendall: "You’re not paying attention. Pay attention, stay with me."


Not that this isn’t enjoyable, but – Lena doesn’t know you’ve taken over everything, Kendall. Remember? Pariah? Bug poison pellets?

Kendall: "You know what it takes to run Cambias and Enchantment, which I expect to run as soon as Alexander’s will hits probate. You’re going to be my right-hand."


There’s just a little problem with this scenario: Alexander left everything to Ryan so, unless Kendall convinces him to let her rule the roost, Lena’s going to have to fend off the INS. Again. Not even out of the roach motel and you’re back in there, Lena!

Lena: "People have the wrong idea about you, Kendall: they say you have no heart."
Kendall: "I don’t."
Lena: "Liar. […] You’re an amazing woman, as amazing as your sister: I’d be honored to work with you."


And let’s keep it to work, mmmk? I’m not ready for Kendall/Lena HoHay just yet. Though, well. Heh. Lena, whatever gets you out of that bottomless pit of insipid work you’ve been given is just fine with me: go hit it with the Fusion Sisters and give Bianca something to think about.


The Fair – Greenlee and Juan Pablo are upside down in one of those cage thingies. He has a trick: act as if you were right-side up. I’m trying, I swear, but your upside-down kissage is making it extremely hard.


The Last Scenes – Outside the penthouse, Erica asks David whether he thinks Bianca will be ok.

Erica: "You think that Bianca is gonna make it, don’t you? I mean, survive the – the rape and the pregnancy and now the terminating of it?"

The terminating of it? No, that’s not at all awkward, McThing. Really, this is how we talk. Abortion? What’s that?

Inside, Bianca, looking at a photo album, stops at a picture of Erica with Mini Bianca. Aw, you were an ugl – I mean, cute baby, weren’t you?

At the warehouse, Jack arrives and takes a look at Frosty*ss.

Jack: "D*** you, Cambias: wish to hell they never had found you."

Oh, sure, blame the dead man! And why are you walking into the scene of the crime and messing it up, you *ss?

Juan Pablo makes Greenlee feels as if she were defying gravity. Yeah? You both make me feel like taking a shower.

At the Pink Panther Sauna, Bill the Englishman leaves a still hiding Ryan alone – until Kendall walks in. Would you two just see each other already?


TOMORROW ON ALL MY CHILDREN: The Fusion women meet in the sauna; Juan Pablo asks Carlos if he’s the killer; Edmund asks Jack if there is a reason he wants Michael’s killer to go free.





FASHION POLICE

This commentary is by K. Faygen.

Lena ponders whether Enchantment's medical plan is retroactive.


Maybe the hospital food is okay


Live by the following statement:

Hospitalization and depression are no excuse for dirty hair and no make-up!
Today Lena wallowed in depression…and bad fashion sense by wearing a shapeless white hospital gown with blue polka dots, and white trim. Going for the, ‘I don’t give a d***’ look, Lena cast aside her make-up bag and went au natural, exposing her pale and sun deprived skin to the world…along with the dark circles under her eyes.

The crowning ‘glory’ of today’s look was a mess of oily uncombed locks perched unceremoniously upon her mopey head.

The only symmetry of today’s outfit were matching bands of white around each wrist; on one wrist Lena’s hospital ID band, and on the other, white tape holding her IV needle in place.

Thank God Kendall threw a more suitable ensemble at her and demanded that Lena change clothes immediately. Granted…it was the same outfit Lena wore when being admitted to the hospital, but wearing the same outfit twice in one week is forgivable when the only other choice is an off the rack shapeless monstrosity.

Take heart! With Lena back at work at Enchantment it’s just a matter of time until she returns to her former glory as a fashion maven and clothes horse!

Today’s ensemble: No stars out of a possible five.



PARODY

This parody is by LizzieT.

Lena parts are indicated in red for those who only want a Lena fix

Greenlee and Juan Pablo got closer.
Juan Pablo: My lovely one, I have just realized that you live in your eyes.
Greenlee: That sounds so romantic. But what does it mean?
Juan Pablo: I don't have a clue. But I do like the way it sounds. Now excuse me. I think your mother is about to break in to my hotel room. Shall we hide in the closet?
Greenlee: :::sigh::::This brings back so many memories.
Mary: Good. No one's home. I'll just rifle through his drawers and see what I can find.
Juan Pablo: Can you do that on American television?
Greenlee: What are you doing here mother?
Mary: I came to tell you something about Juan Pablo.
Greenlee: What, that he's my long lost brother?
Mary: Don't be silly. They did that years ago with Erica and Mark. I came to tell you that I saw Carlos coming in to Juan Pablo's hotel room.
Greenlee: You're slipping Mother. No one cares what Carlos does anymore.
Juan Pablo: Thank you for not telling your mother that Carlos is my brother. I don't want to be tarnished by his unpopularity.
Greenlee: I know. I've been there. Now let's go to the carnival and ride the rides.
Juan Pablo: Why?
Greenlee: Maybe the audience will like us better upside down.

Aidan ran into Kendall at the Valley Inn.
Aidan: Oi'm leaving town Kendall. Oi migh never return.
Kendall: Oh Aidan, you can't go.
Aidan: Whoi? Wewd yew miss me?
Kendall: A little. Besides, I need to have at least two men after me at all times. I am Erica's daughter you know.
Aidan: Oi don't know about yew Kendall. Oi'm a trined inquisitioner and Oi can't get yew to tell me the trewth. Oi'm leaving on a special Ops mission.
Kendall: Don't do that!
Aidan: Does this mean yew'll tell me whot really appened to Moichal?
Kendall: No. I just think the world is in bad enough shape already without you adding to the problems. At least here in Pine Valley you won't effect international security.

Then Kendall went to visit Lena.
Nurse: Sorry, you can't see her unless you're family.
Kendall: I'm her sister.
Nurse: But she has an accent and you don't.
Kendall: Hello? Haven't you seen the Juan Pablo and Carlos scenes?
Nurse: Are you kidding? Those are what the FF button is for. I guess you can go in.
Kendall: So Lena I came to cheer you up. How could you do something so stupid? You should handle your suffering the way I handled mine.
Lena: By marrying Michael Cambias and alienating everyone in town? I think rat poison was less painful.
Kendall: Quit feeling sorry for yourself and come to work for me. I'll pay you enough money to move back out of the Pine Cone.
Lena: It's a deal. You know Kendall, everyone in town may say you're a heartless creature with a black soul and no redeeming qualities but I think they're wrong.
Kendall: :::sniff sniff:::That's the nicest thing anyone's said to me in weeks.

David came to see Erica and Bianca.
Erica: Did you come to talk about ....you know?
Bianca: David, you said you wouldn't talk about ....you know.
Erica: Wait a minute. Bianca what do you know about ....you know?
Bianca: Nothing. Mom, what do you know about...you know?
Erica: Nothing. David why are you here?
David: I'm not sure now. You've gotten me all confused. Oh yes, Bianca I brought you these pills for ....you know. Be sure to take them with food. In fact, go get some food right now. Erica, while she's getting food let's go out in the hall so we can talk about ...you know. :::pause:::I'd better be careful and not get my you know's mixed up. That could be bad.
Erica: So what is it you wanted to tell me?
David: I have something for you that I know you'll be really happy to see again.
Erica: Please David. I am still engaged to Jack.
David: Not that. I have your date book.
Erica: Where did you get it?
David: Aidan found it at Michael's condo.
Erica: Oh no. Do you think he'll tell anyone?
David: I don't think so. And even if he did, I doubt anyone would understand him.
Erica: Does anyone else know about this?
David: Anna but she's been written out. Jack knows too but it looks like he's going to let you get away with it.
Erica: You know what that means. It means he still loves me. I wonder if I should take him back right away or make him beg for a while.
David: Erica, this thing doesn't revolve around you and your love life.
Erica: Of course it does. Haven't you watched this show for the past 30 years? ....sigh...I just wish I could forget what happened the night.....you know.
David: Don't worry. Soon you can forget all about Michael Cambias.
Erica: You're not planning on slipping me that memory drug are you?
David: No, no. It was just a figure of speech.
Erica: Good. I have to thank you for keeping my secret.
David: I'll take your secret to the grave. Oh writers, that was just a figure of speech too. Don't get any ideas.

Ryan continued to examine his find.
Ryan: So Michael is now a Scumsicle. How appropriate.
Rat: Hey, I just thought of a better word. How about Slugsicle?
Ryan: I like it. Uh oh, someone's coming.
Rat: Don't worry. It's just Edmund.
Ryan: Edmund, what are you doing here?
Edmund: No one was at the boathouse. What's going on here?
Ryan: Look what I found. A Stiff on a Stick.
Edmund: So we finally found Michael Cambias. Now what?
Ryan: Why don't we just leave him here? It's not like anyone cares who killed him.
Rat: You can't do that. After all this time setting up a murder mystery and making everyone in town a suspect you can't find the body and not report it. Besides, I'm tired of it cluttering up my home.
Ryan: I guess you're right. Do you think the Pine Valley police will be able to tell exactly when he died even though he's been frozen?
::::pause::::
Ryan and Edmund: Bwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!
Edmund: I'd forgotten what a funny guy you are. Now I'll call the police.
Ryan: I'll go back to lurking. I think I'll lurk in the steam room this time. I've been back long enough without taking off my shirt.

The police arrived at the warehouse.
Edmund: Where's Derek?
Officer: He's been made Chief of Police.
Edmund: Finally! Does this mean we'll actually see him on screen.
Officer: Probably not. Now suppose you tell me what happened here.
Edmund: I heard a rumor that Michael Cambias was hanging out here so I came to check it out.
Officer: :::groan::::
Edmund: When I found this guy I knew he was either Michael Cambias or a dead ringer for him.
Officer: :::groan:::::
Edmund: I'd always heard he was a cold hearted devil but this is ridiculous.
Officer: :::::groan:::::Stop! I can't take any more of this! What about that extra set of footprints in the freezer? Who do they belong too?
Edmund: Beats me. Probably some lurking newbie or returning character.
Officer: In Pine Valley that doesn't exactly narrow things down. But don't worry. With the PVPD on the case we'll solve the murder of Michael Cambias - maybe even by next May Sweeps.



QUOTES

Kendall: Yeah, hi, is she awake? I'm -- i'm her sister. She is? She's talking? Ok, don't let her go anywhere.

Kendall: Who's going to stop me?

Kendall: Listen, sister, I found that woman in there half dead and saved her life. That gives me some rights, thank you.

Kendall: Got a little insect poison hangover working there, huh?

Lena: I'm not sure I should thank you.
Kendall: That's gratitude for you. Hmm. You are something else, you know that, lena? You are something else. My life hasn't exactly been an ice cream social lately, but you don't see me throwing myself a pity party, helping myself to a glass of arsenic on the rocks.

Kendall: You're always pouring your heart out, saying how much you love her.
Lena: I do love her.
Kendall: Then you had to prove how much you couldn't live without her by trying to kill yourself?

Kendall: What if I hadn't showed up? What if Bianca was getting a phone call right now that her former lover had been toe-tagged and body-bagged? What do you call that, Lena, huh, shock therapy?

Kendall: It's time to turn off the waterworks, Lena.

Kendall: Oh, you're not getting out, Lena. Dead, you're no good to either one of us. You're no good to anybody, especially Bianca.

Kendall: From here on out, it's time for you to straighten up and fly right. And if Bianca finds if in that bottomless heart of hers to forgive you, then more power to her. If she doesn't, then live with it.

Kendall: You're not paying attention. Pay attention. Stay with me, Lena. Listen -- you know what it takes to run Cambias and Enchantment, which I expect to run as soon as Alexander's will hits probate. You're going to be my right hand.

Kendall: We'll discuss salary and benefits, and there will be a very generous signing bonus if you say yes in the next five seconds.

Lena: Wait. You're an amazing woman. As amazing as your sister.



TRANSCRIPT

Unverified in non-clip parts

***** (clip a) [Kendall calls to see on the progress of her "sister"]

Kendall: Yeah, hi, is she awake? I'm -- i'm her sister. She is? She's talking? Ok, don't let her go anywhere.

***** (clip b) [Kendall reads Lena the riot act for trying to off herself]

[amc030924b-alt2 starts]
Nurse: Excuse me, miss, but you can't go in there.
Kendall: Who's going to stop me?
Nurse: Only medical staff and family are allowed in the rooms. I'm sorry.
Kendall: Listen, sister, I found that woman in there half dead and saved her life. That gives me some rights, thank you. [enters Lena's room] Ok, you -- time to rise and shine and face the future.
Lena: Oh. My head.
Kendall: Got a little insect poison hangover working there, huh?
Lena: Kendall. They said you're the one who found me.
Kendall: Yeah, saved your pathetic hide is what i did.
Lena: I'm not sure I should thank you.
Kendall: That's gratitude for you. Hmm. You are something else, you know that, lena? You are something else. My life hasn't exactly been an ice cream social lately, but you don't see me throwing myself a pity party, helping myself to a glass of arsenic on the rocks.
Lena: My life wasn't worth saving.
Kendall: Yeah, well, I didn't do it for you. Personally, I think you're a selfish nothing.
Lena: Then why?
Kendall: Why the h*** else do you think? I did it for Bianca. You're always pouring your heart out, saying how much you love her.
Lena: I do love her.
Kendall: Then you had to prove how much you couldn't live without her by trying to kill yourself? Lena, what if I hadn't showed up? What if Bianca was getting a phone call right now that her former lover had been toe-tagged and body-bagged? What do you call that, Lena, huh, shock therapy?
Lena: I didn't know what else to do. I'm sorry.
Kendall: Did you really think your death would help Bianca? Did you really honestly think that? What is wrong with you? Like my sister doesn't have enough horrible things going on in her life. She would definitely blame herself and she would carry that guilt around with her for the rest of her life. Like my sister needs one more horrible thing to obsess on when she can't sleep at night. What is wrong with you, Lena?
[Lena cries]
Kendall: You got about two seconds to sob yourself raw, and then you know what? It's time for you to get it together and act like an adult.

***** (clip c) [Kendall gives Lena some more tough love and a job]

[amc030924c-alt2 starts]
Kendall: It's time to turn off the waterworks, Lena. [Gives her kleenix] Here.
Lena: You're right about me, Kendall. What i did was selfish.
Kendall: Yeah, not to mention stupid.
Lena: All I could think about was what I did, the effect my actions had on Bianca. I'm the one who brought Cambias to town. It's my fault. It's my shame. I'm the one who set the whole thing in motion -- the rape, the pregnancy, the abortion.
Kendall: You know about that, huh?
Lena: I'm going to carry that guilt to my grave.
Kendall: Oh, you're not getting out, Lena. Dead, you're no good to either one of us. You're no good to anybody, especially Bianca.
Lena: I know that now.
Kendall: Not that I'm handing out a free pass here. You want to feel guilty? Knock yourself out. But carry the load the way I have because I'll be d***** if I'm going to let you leave Bianca to deal with your mess.
Lena: That's not what I want.
Kendall: Well, then, I'm going to hold you to that. From here on out, it's time for you to straighten up and fly right. And if Bianca finds if in that bottomless heart of hers to forgive you, then more power to her. If she doesn't, then live with it. [Gets Lena's clothes] Here.
Lena: What are you doing?
Kendall: Put your clothes on, get changed, put your face on, and then report to my office at Enchantment asap.
Lena: Erica will have me thrown out --
kendall: Erica doesn't call the shots anymore. I do.
Lena: I don't understand.
Kendall: You're not paying attention. Pay attention. Stay with me, Lena. Listen -- you know what it takes to run Cambias and Enchantment, which I expect to run as soon as Alexander's will hits probate. You're going to be my right hand.
Lena: You're offering me a position?
Kendall: Yes. We'll discuss salary and benefits, and there will be a very generous signing bonus if you say yes in the next five seconds.
Lena: People have the wrong idea about you, kendall. They say you have no heart.
Kendall: I don'T.
Lena: Liar.
Kendall: You can think what you want. It doesn't really matter to me.
Lena: Wait. You're an amazing woman. As amazing as your sister. I'll be honored to work with you.
Kendall: See you at the office.



CLIPS

I have the following complete clips: B, C
amc030924b.avi (16.4; 1:58) Kendall reads Lena the riot act for trying to off herself
amc030924c.avi (21.3m; 2:32) Kendall gives Lena some more tough love and a job

The above described clips can also be found on my shared folder on AIM (http://www.aim.com to download). My user name on AIM is kymtaborn. E-mail me with your AIM user name (ktaborn@lightspeed.net) and I will give you access to the shared folder. When you have access, you can right click my user name on your buddy list and then click on get file. That should get you into the shared folder. If you have problems, then tweak your firewall. The downloads are slow because it has to go through the AIM filter AND often there are a lot of people downloading along with you. I apologize for the slow speed but this is the only way that I can distribute the clips at this time.

I am eliciting volunteers to host the clips throughout the web. If you have 5-25megs of space you can lend to this project, please let me know!



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