Whoosh! ...
Lena ponders losing
track of Bianca again

Lena Kundera

April 13, 2004

Last update: 06/27/04

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From The Official Site at ABC.com:

Maggie blames Lena for Bianca's disappearance but soon apologizes.

From About All My Children

Lena makes calls looking for Bianca before sinking down into a chair and berating herself for falling asleep, "How could I let this happen?" Maggie comes in the room and agrees that's what she'd like to know. She angrily says she was supposed to look after Bianca; she said she had it covered. She promised her, and she trusted her, "Do you have any idea what you've done?"...

Lena protests that she fell asleep! Bianca looked so peaceful, and had finally settled down. She looked so peaceful and quiet in the dark; somewhere in her mind, she must have thought she could close her eyes for just a moment. Maggie can blame her all she wants, but she would never do anything to intentionally hurt Bianca! Maggie knows, and is sorry; this isn't supposed to be happening, and she shouldn't have lost her baby! She sighs that Bianca must be in a lot of pain if the only thing that could make it better was to take someone else's baby. Lena wonders what pushed her over the line to take Bess? Maggie says it didn't happen last night, it happened the moment she was told her baby was dead.

From Soap Slut

Naggie came in and bitched Lena out for falling asleep on her Bianca Watch. Shut up, Naggie.


This all gay recap is by C.K..
Read all the All Gay Re-caps at http://groups.yahoo.com/group/TheAllGayRecap/.


  • Bianca snaps and snatches.
  • Lena rolls her eyes.
  • Maggie snaps and flails.
  • J.R. flounders.
  • Tad wonders.

The Set-Up – At BJ’s, Tad and Aidan have a severe case of HoYayngover.

At the hospital, Anita tells Kendall that Bianca took off with Bessimo. All right, where is this hospital, at the Southern edge of the Sahara (Tombouctou comes to mind)? Newborns wear ankle monitors that are not removed until the parents/guardians leave the hospital with them: Bianca could not have just walked out and not set off the alarms which would have placed the hospital in automatic lockdown. I know the writers are stupid, but you’d think they’d share the single functioning brain cell they have left and come up with a better scenario for this.

Bianca walks into Erica’s penthouse, puts MiMo in a laundry basket and can’t wait to introduce her to her mother. Oh, yeah: I’m sure Erica will just melt and accept the wrinkly turtle now.

At Jack’s place, Greenlee faces an unhappy virgin.

Bianca’s Room – Lena berates herself for having fallen asleep.

Lena: "Idiot, stupid idiot. What’s the matter with me, how could I fall asleep? How could I let this happen?"

Stretch, it was the middle of the night: to your credit, at least the possibility that Bianca is a lunatic who might become a baby snatcher didn’t cross your mind.

Maggie: "That’s what I want to know. You were supposed to look after Bianca."
Lena: "Maggie, please: don’t start with me."
Maggie: "No: you said that I didn’t have to be here. You said that you had it covered. You promised me and I trusted you, Lena."

Thank god you’re back to being a jackass because that whole "Bianca is lucky to have you, Lena" thing freaked me out. Let’s see: whom did I see passed out on the couch while Lena was watching over Bianca, hum? That’s right, that was you. I’d be weary of accusing anyone of anything I might be guilty of under the same set of circumstances, Maggie, because I have no doubt you’d be sleeping on the job even if you were being paid to keep your sorry ass awake so - shut up, you tool. And Lena, quit being a pus…erm, wuss and open a can of whoop ass on that imbecile: no sense getting incensed every time she pisses you off if you never do anything about it. You’re in a hospital: find something sharp and put it to good use.

Jack’s Pad – Funky music – because, again, in case you haven’t noticed, Reggie and Danielle are black and the music dudes are hip to that. Boring blah, blah, blah until Livia – Livia! Where have you been? – walks in with lasagna for Jack and finds her niece, Danielle, in a slip. Danielle, as in Danielle Stephanie Frye. As in the daughter of acting Chief of Police Derek Frye. How shocking! I never, ever would have guessed they were related even though Chief Frye is the only black person in town. Fuck you AMC.

The Penthouse – The music of Oh Fuck plays on while Bianca points to a picture of her mother and tells MiMo that she looks "exactly like" Erica, "the most beautiful woman in the world."

Yo, MiMo: this would be a perfect time to scream your little head off in protest.

Pointing to a picture of Kendall, Bianca continues her monologue.

Bianca: "This other beauty is your Auntie Kendall, who has turned out to be the most incredible, remarkable, astonishing human being and she loves you so much already you wouldn’t even believe it."

Sniff. Look at Bianca glow: Kinks all the way across town.

The Hospital – Kendall tells Ryan she’s worried that losing MiMo might have "pushed Bianca right over the edge."

Kendall: "I’m afraid that Bianca’s mind just shattered into pieces."

Bianca might be cracking, but a mother knows her baby. Well, that’s what mothers always say, so I thought I’d give it a shot: it could not be any more ridiculous than this entire story.

Kendall and Ryan HandShag outside the nursery.

Kendall, how could you? Your girlfister is missing and you’re HandShagging that monkey’s ass? At least have the decency to do it with Greenlee!

Bianca’s Room – Exasperated, Lena tells Maggie that she fell asleep after Bianca had "finally settled down" and, since it was "so dark and quiet," she "must have thought [she] could close [her] eyes for just a moment."

Lena: "You can blame me all you want but I would never intentionally do anything to hurt Bianca."
Maggie: "I know. I know, I’m sorry."

Whatevercakes: my rant stands. And what’s with the three buttons on the left sleeve? Do you still get dressed by stepping into you shirts? I used to do that when I was three.

Erica’s Penthouse – Bianca tells MiMo that, after the crash, everyone thought she and her incubator had taken the scenic route down the river but that her "special instincts" told her the truth.

Is that line in the goody bag new mothers get after they deliver?

Bianca: "This is my promise to you: now that we’re together again, nothing, no one, is ever going to keep us apart."

What’s that sound? Oh, it’s just my maniacal laughter. Carry on.

Babe’s Room – J.R. tells Babe that Bianca "took" Bessimo and that MiMo died; Babe worries only about Bianca and mourns the plans the two of them had made for their kids.

J.R.: "You’re still Bianca’s best friend."

Bwah! I can’t wait till Maggie finds out. Oh, I know some of you believe that a new best friend for Bianca just clears the way for BAM, but I don’t wear obsession-tinted glasses so I really can’t relate.

The Last Scenes – At the hospital, Babe keeps J.R. from calling the police because she believes Bianca will bring back Bessimo once she "figures everything out." Who, Bianca? Good luck with that.

At the penthouse, Bianca tells the tale of Princess Miranda and MiMo gasses it all out.

At the hospital, Tad wonders whether Bessimo might really be MiMo. I almost fell for this once: I think I’ll keep on ducking the anvils until some half-witted ass thinks a DNA test might just be in order. Pfft.

TOMORROW ON ALL MY CHILDREN: Ryan argues with Adam; Greenlee blames herself; Krystal slaps Tad.


This parody is by LizzieT.

Greenlee went to see Reggie.
Reggie: What are you doing here?
Greenlee: I'm working on my "best big sister in the world" merit badge. So did you have sex last night?
Reggie: I don't think that's a "best big sister in the world" kind of question. Maybe you should ask me if I drank my milk this morning or if I want some oatmeal.
Danielle: Could you two keep it down out there?
Greenlee: Did she just tell me to shut up? I think that girl could out-diva me. Do you even know anything about her?
Reggie: I know everything I need to know.
Livia: Hello. I know Jack has been going through one of the worst experiences of his life so I brought him some lasagna.
Reggie: For breakfast?
Livia: You're not one of those low carb fanatics are you?
Danielle: I said could you keep it down out here?
Livia: Danielle! What are you doing here?
Danielle: You recognized me?
Livia: Of course I recognized you. I'm your aunt.
Danielle: Rats. Bobby Warner said no one in Pine Valley ever recognizes anyone. Now I'm busted.
Reggie: Hey, if she's your aunt then that means your father is the chief of police.
Livia: True. And if he finds out about this he just may have you arrested. He won't take kindly to his daughter being back in town and having scenes with you instead of providing storyline for him.
Reggie: The Montgomery Curse strikes again. What is it about this family and relationships anyway?

Things were tense at the hospital.
Kendall: What's going on here?
Anita: I have some good news and some bad news. The good news is that we're taking steps to correct a major flaw in hospital security. The bad news is that Bianca took Bess Chandler out of the nursery right past hospital security.
Kendall: How could such a thing happen?
Anita: I don't know. Those security guards were trained by the Wildwind security staff. I just don't understand it.
JR: Understand what?
Anita: I have good news and bad news. The good news is that Bianca felt like leaving the hospital. The bad news is that she took your baby with her.
JR: She took my baby? How could you people let that happen?
Anita: Why does everyone only focus on the bad news?
JR: Poor Babe. She must be a wreck.
Anita: Oh, we didn't tell her.
JR: Why not? She's the baby's mother.
Anita: We don't like to inform the families when the patients disappear. It makes for such bad PR.
Joe: Anita, I have some good news and some bad news. The good news is that as a newbie you did outrank the extra from yesterday. The bad news is that this is all your fault and you must face disciplinary action.
Anita: I'll just call Maria and tell her what happened. Maria, something happened but it wasn't bad. OK, it was bad but it wasn't really bad. Ok, it was really bad but it wasn't really really bad. OK, my life might as well be over. Call me Ok?
Aidan: Ere, ere, don't worry. It will be awl roit.
Anita: Do you really think so?
Aidan: Of course. Me and Tad ave a ole detective igency dedicited just to tracking down the Kine women. We'll find er spit spot.

JR went in to see Babe.
Babe: Where's Bess?
JR: Something happened. Bianca took her and left the hospital.
Babe: Why would Bianca take our baby? They aren't doing one of those stupid baby switch storylines are they?
JR: No, its not like that. At least not that I know of.
Babe: Then why wouldn't she take Miranda?
JR: Miranda who?
Babe: Oh no! Don't tell me....
JR: All right. I won't tell you. But it's true.
Babe: Poor Bianca.
JR: Should we call the police about Bess?
Babe: No way. If best friends can't kidnap each other's kids once in a while who can? Bianca won't hurt Bess. So don't you dare call the police.
JR: I won't. Just one more example of how Babe=Good.

Tad found Krystal in the hall.
Tad: How are they holding up?
Krystal: What do you mean?
Tad: You mean you haven't heard? Krystal, I have some good news and some bad news.

Kendall talked to Ryan.
Kendall: What if Bianca has lost her mind and thinks that Bess is really Miranda?
Ryan: Ahhh, going for the irony of the only person who can see the truth being considered crazy?
Kendall: I'd bet on it. Bianca's been so strong through all of this - except for the hallucinations and blocking out the fact that she killed someone. What if this is the one thing she can't get past? What if this sends her straight to Oak Haven?
Ryan: I wish I could do something to make it better Kendall. Would it help if I took my shirt off?

Bianca took Miranda to Erica's penthouse.
Bianca: Mom, are you home? I have someone I'd like you to meet.
Miranda: I've heard Grandma's in Vegas. Maybe we should join her, play a little blackjack, shoot some craps, hide out from the cops.
Bianca: Here, I'll just put you in this laundry basket. It's a perfect fit.
Miranda: A laundry basket? For me? I don't think so!
Bianca: All right. I'll hold you instead. Why don't I prop you up on my shoulder?
Miranda: And turn my back to the camera? I don't think so!
Bianca: Picky little thing aren't you? Oh good, the guy is here with the baby stuff. Thank you so much for bringing it.
Delivery man: Anything for Ms. Kane and her girls.
Miranda: While such devotion from the little people is nice, doesn't it make you wonder how this man hasn't heard the reports of my alleged death in the helicopter crash? Obviously, I need a new press agent.
Bianca: Look at these pictures Miranda. This is your grandmother Erica. You know, you look like her.
Miranda: I wave my arms around like she does too - see? And wait until you see one of my hissy fits.
Bianca: And this is your Auntie Kendall.
Miranda: I think I have her cheekbones. I know it's hard to see them but I'm pretty sure their there.
Bianca: This is your Uncle Jack.
Miranda: I'm laying odds he'll be Grandpa Jack if Grandma comes to her senses by November Sweeps. Speaking of odds, why don't we join Grandma out in Vegas? I have a feeling some of those people who are under the delusion that I'm someone named Bess may be looking for us.
Bianca: Now I'll tell you a story about the evil dragon and how Mommy rescued the Princess Miranda from him.
Miranda: Why don't you tell me the story about the evil network executive who thought that a baby switch story that would go on for years was a good idea? I like the part where Princess Miranda rallied the internet fans and got them to write letters and sign petitions demanding that the story wrap up quickly and that Princess Miranda be restored to the Kane Women Throne.
Bianca: I like that story too. And did they live happily ever after?
Miranda: On a soap? You've got to be kidding.



Lena is forced to practice some self-flagellation while Bianca is missing


Too bad Lena did not finally snap and crush Maggie like an insect


Unverified in non-clip parts

***** (clip a)

Lena: No, no, I'm sure everything's fine. Listen, if you do see her, please, she has my number. Thank you, yes. Oh. Oh, God. Idiot! Stupid idiot! What's the matter with me? How could I fall asleep? How could I let this happen? God!
Maggie: Yeah, that's what I'd like to know. You were supposed to look after Bianca.
Lena: Maggie, please, don't start with me.
Maggie: No, you said that I didn't have to be here. You said that you had it covered. You promised me, and I trusted you, Lena.
Lena: Not now. I -- I have to find Bianca.
Maggie: Do you have any idea what you've done?

***** (clip b)

Ryan: Aidan's checking with the cab companies. You know, it's not going to be too tough to remember a woman and a baby in the middle of the night. So if she did take a taxi from here, we'll be able to find out where they let her off.
Kendall: Thank you.
Ryan: Ok, and Tad's making calls, we've all made calls. Everybody's on it. The word is out.
Kendall: Yeah, Lena and Maggie called some of Bianca's friends from school.
Ryan: Oh, good. That's good.
Kendall: Ryan, I'm really scared. We're all assuming that Bianca took Bess because she just misses her own baby so much.
Ryan: Well, I -- I think that's a reasonable assumption.
Kendall: Yeah, but what if we're wrong? What if we're wrong? What if Bianca -- what if Bianca took Bess because she actually believes that it's her little Miranda?
Ryan: Kendall, that's -- that's a hell of a leap.
Kendall: No, think about everything my sister has gone through. When does a person reach their breaking point?
Ryan: You know what you're saying?
Kendall: Before Miranda was even born, I used to wonder how Bianca could stay so strong and so together when the rest of us were just falling apart.
Ryan: Because -- because that's who your sister is.
Kendall: No. Ryan, what if this time is too far? What if she's too far gone? Losing her baby could be the one thing that just put her right over the edge. That's what I'm afraid of. I'm afraid that -- I'm afraid that Bianca's mind just shattered into pieces.
Kendall: I mean, if Bianca really, truly thought that this was her baby -- oh, God. Oh, God. Ryan, no, we have to go to the airport. We have to check the airport. Yes!
Ryan: Kendall, she would need ID and she would need money and --
Kendall: No, no, no, no. Bianca -- when her pregnancy was still a secret, she was going to run away and she was going to raise the baby someplace else. So maybe in her mind, maybe she's still going through with those plans, especially if she senses that there's something wrong, that there's a threat to her and the baby.
Ryan: Hey, hey, hey, I will not let you talk yourself in this, ok? I guarantee that Bianca has not left the country. She left here in her nightgown, all right, and she hasn't been to her apartment and the stores are just opening now. Believe me, if she tried to check into an airport or a train station or something, they would notice her.
Kendall: Oh, God, Ryan, I wish you were right.
Ryan: I am. Soon, Bianca is going to realize what she's done and she's going to walk back into this hospital with the baby in her arms. Hey, hey, hey, hey, look at me. We're going to find them, all right, safe and well. You have to believe that.
Kendall: I want to.

***** (clip c)

Lena: I fell asleep, ok? I didn't mean to. It's just she finally settled down and she looked so peaceful and it was so dark and quiet, and somewhere in my mind I must have thought that I could just close my eyes for just a moment. You can blame me all you want, but I would never intentionally do anything to hurt Bianca.
Maggie: I know. I know. I'm sorry. This isn't supposed to be happening, ok, because she shouldn't have lost her baby. She must have been in a lot of pain if the only thing that could make it better was to take someone else's baby.
Lena: We have to figure out what happened last night, what pushed her over the line, what made her take Bess.
Maggie: Lena, it didn't happen last night. It happened the moment she was told that her baby was dead.


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