REGULAR CAST, GUEST CAST & CREDITS
TV GUIDE PROMO
SYNOPSIS by Sally Dye
THINGS TO LOOK OUT FOR
David Baxter (The Crypt Keeper)
Junior Chile (Lad)
Written by Hilary J. Bader
Directed by John Laing
TV GUIDE PROMO
A grave robber plies his infamous trade in the name of the Daring Dragoon (Bruce Campbell). With Angela Dotchin and Stuart Devenie. ClickTV
Emilia sacrifices her safety to catch a thief. ExciteTV
This commentary is by Sally Dye.
Jack and Emilia are being measured for new clothes and discussing their plans for the day. Em's idea is to go to town to purchase accessories for their new wardrobe. Jack says he would rather stick icepicks in his toenails. Em: "Oh, well, it's your choice. I'm game for either."
A group of mourners are carrying a coffin into a crypt, where they find the tombs desecrated and a note left behind.
Jack and Em are shopping. Jack advises Em to do more haggling. They see people running and stop a guy to ask what's up. He tells them that the mausoleum has been broken into and vandalized and whoever did it left a note. Em wonders who would stoop so low as to rob from the dead. The guy says the note was from the Daring Dragoon.
Jack and Em are discussing the vandalism. Jack is indignant that his reputation is being dragged through the mud. Em says they must spend the night in the cemetery so they can catch the culprit in the act. Jack is not happy with the plan, but agrees.
Em makes fun of Jack for being uneasy in the cemetery. She asks Jack if he has ever wondered what happens to you when you've passed on. Jack says that your loved ones either stick you in a box or barbecue you and that's the end of it. Em says for once she agrees with him. Jack say on the other hand he hopes to be reincarnated as Marie Antoinette's bar of soap. Em declares that they should focus on the matter at hand and keep quiet.
By the next morning no graverobbers have appeared. Jack and Em see a man enter the crypt and then hear him cry out. Running inside they see that there has been more vandalism. The man is holding a note which reads: "If you don't meet my demands, there will be more desecrations." It is signed by the Dragoon.
Jack and Em wonder how anyone could have gotten past them and into the mausoleum. Em decides they must stake out the crypt from the inside. Jack says how can they do that, since the only people in the mausoleum at night are " D..E..D, dead." Em shows Jack her new serum which will put her in a coma so deep that everyone will think her dead. This way she can be in the mausoleum, the serum will wear off and she will catch the graverobbers. Jack says no way, it's too dangerous, but Em drinks the potion before he can stop her and collapses into his arms.
Jack gives the eulogy at Em's "funeral". Croque and Brogard mourn the fact that it is Emilia who is gone and not Jack. Brogard: "What a world, when a beautiful creature such as Madame Rothschild is struck down while the likes of Monsieur Styles continues to slither about." Croque: "What a pity it was not you who died instead of the fair Emilia." Jack is sure it is the grief talking. He asks to have a moment alone with his former employer. Determined not to let her out of his sight until she wakes, he gets in the coffin with her and closes the lid. Croque and Brogard return and discuss honoring Emilia by cremating her at once. The coffin is taken to the crematorium and put into the fire.
Jack can't seem to loosen the lid of the coffin. Emilia awakes and wants to know: 1 - "Where am I?" 2 - "What are YOU doing here?" and 3 -- "What is that smell?" Upon being informed that they are being cremated, Em berates Jack for not being outside the coffin rescuing her. Together they manage to rock the coffin out of the furnace (though at first Em thinks Jack is trying to do something quite different). The coffin breaks open and they emerge to see Brogard desecrating the tombs and then disappearing through a hidden door. They follow him through a series of passages until he finally goes through a door that leads into Croque's study. Jack and Em overhear Croque and Brogard talking about how the Dragoon is becoming the most unpopular man on Pulau Pulau. They make a toast to Emilia, wishing she were there to see it. This causes Em to get a little misty-eyed, much to Jack's annoyance. He tells her she should have heard his eulogy -- "There wasn't a dry eye in the house." Em confides to Jack that while she was in the coma she saw the universe in its totality as a single blinding light. Jack: "Of course you saw a light -- we were on fire!" Croque says he hopes the dead understand what they are trying to do, and Brogard is surprised at his superstition. This gives Jack and Em an idea.
Croque is in his study reading when the Dragoon leaps in through the window and confronts him. Croque says he has been expecting this and Brogard and his men emerge to capture the Dragoon. Jack fights them all and then escapes through the secret door. They chase him through the passages to the mausoleum. Just as Croque and Brogard are about to apprehend the Dragoon, Em's "ghost" appears from the crematorium. Jack says he has raised the dead and will raise others if they don't cease the desecrations. Em adds that they must make restitution to the families of the dead and clear the Dragoon's name. Overcome with fright, Croque and Brogard agree to all these conditions.
At a tea at the governor's mansion, Em tells Croque and Brogard that the Dragoon must have drugged her with a compound capable of simulating death for his own evil purposes. Jack enters to announce that the Dragoon's name has been cleared. Croque and Brogard announce that they are late for confession and leave. Em tells Jack that she did indeed see something that she can't explain while she was "dead". Jack suggests that they go get some barbecued ribs "in honor of today's events." Em agrees: "Let's go where the spirits move us." They leave arm in arm.
THINGS TO LOOK OUT FOR
11-09-01. From Allison. The temple where Hercules pounded the hinds blood dagger into the stone steps, and where Hope is seen looking for it in xena's sacrifice eps, is used in "Dead Woman Walking" in Jack of all Trades.
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