TV GUIDE PROMO
Gabrielle unwittingly becomes a pawn in a theater scam.
Gabrielle makes her debut as a playright. Too bad her producer is
actually a con artist who has her reasons for wanting the play to bomb.
Gabrielle unwittingly becomes a pawn in a theater scam when one of her scrolls falls
into the hands of Zehra, the "Queen of Cons".
"The Queen of Cons" convinces Gabrielle to base a play on her adventures with Xena,
so she can run off with the production's investment money.
Gabrielle makes her debut as a playwrite. Too bad her producer is actually a con artist who has her reasons for wanting the play to bomb
AIRING AND RATING INFORMATION
1st RELEASE: 03-15-99
An AA average of 3.1
Competition from Syndicated Action Dramas:
(1) X-FILES 10th at 5.3
(2) ER 13th with 4.3
(3) STAR TREK DS9 23rd with 3.5
(4) WALKER: TR 25th with 3.3
XENA/HERCULES 3.1
STARGATE SG-1 2.8
THE CROW/EARTH: FINAL CONFLICT/MORTAL KOMBAT 2.3
OUTER LIMITS 2.1
HONEY I SHRUNK THE KIDS 1.8
2nd RELEASE: 06-21-99
An AA average of 3.6
Competition from Syndicated Action Dramas:
(1) X-FILES 10th at 4.7
(2) ER 12th with 3.9
(3) XENA 17th with 3.6
(4) WALKER TEXAS RANGER 19th with 3.5
(5) HERCULES 23rd with 3.2
SYNOPSIS 1:
03-24-99. This synopsis is by Bluesong.
Xena and Gabrielle practice yoga. Gabrielle has lost her newest "favorite"
scroll and is upset about it. Xena tells her to return to some town to look
for it while she goes on to Arcon (?) to help out some prince. Gabrielle
leaves Xena and trots off in search of her lost words. She's wearing her gold
outfit from India, still.
Gabrielle meets a play producer who found her scroll in the restroom. She
convinces Gabrielle to turn her brilliant words into a play, so this woman
(Zere?) can produce the play. Joxer comes into the picture here and decides
to help Gabrielle. Joxer and Gabrielle go off to make plans. Zere laughs
about how she's duping Gabrielle, and hopefully the exercise will get
Gabrielle killed.
Zere and her partner takes Gabrielle to an old run-down closed theater.
Gabrielle is made director. Joxer is her helper. Gabrielle holds a casting
call. She can't find anyone to play Gabrielle, but she casts the first person
(apparently) who comes along as Xena. Minya shows up because she wants to be
Xena, but Gabrielle's already cast the part. A haughty centaur arrives, too.
Gabrielle is writing "a message of peace" and thinks everyone will want to
hear her words. The producer meets with a warlord to get funding. Zere has
taken the money of two warlords and promised each of them 75% of the profits.
Zere makes Joxer a producer.
Gabrielle casts herself as "Gabrielle" (to no one's surprise). They rehearse
the play, which is pretty syrupy. The cast tells Gabrielle they want blood
and sex in the script. Gabrielle insists of her "vision". Joxer makes some
changes behind Gabrielle's back. When they next rehearse, Xena has a skimpy
costume, and there's a severed head on somebody's staff. Gabrielle gets upset
and decides to go talk to Sophocles, "artist to artist". She discovers that
Sophocles is a man she dislikes, and his plays reflect blood and sex. She
goes back to her theater and tells the cast she wants blood and sex. She
tells Zere she wants more money, which cuts into Zere's scam profits, so she
goes and sees yet another warlord begging for funding. This warlord is
somebody Xena beat up several times.
The play sells out the first night. During a play rehearsal, the three
warlords separately sneak in and watch, and they like the blood and sex.
Zere, who wants the play to flop so she can take the money and run, leaving
Gabrielle hanging, tells Gabrielle that the warlords love the play and find it
inspirational for their next campaign. So Gabrielle goes back to her "peace"
message. The third warlord hits Joxer in the head as the play begins. The
warlord and Joxer fight and interrupt the play. Xena shows up. Xena fights
the warlords. The "play" (everyone fighting except Gabrielle) is considered
successful. Minya and the girl playing "Xena" become fast friends. Minya
tells Gabrielle that she has learned that deep down she's a .... thespian.
Joxer is left hanging upside down in the theater.
COMMENTARY 1:
03-24-99. Commentary Beth Gaynor.
I have mixed feelings about this episode. On the one hand, I lost track of
the meta-layers as XenaStaff made fun of themselves not taking themselves
seriously. This brought self-parody to new heights/depths, and I got a kick
out of all the in-jokes. However, in order to do those jokes, we made
Gabrielle a crappy bard, a worse playwright, and someone who couldn't think
her way out of a wet paper bag of a problem. Boo.
Xena agreed to try yoga? This might be a momentous occasion, except that the
yoga looked more like a return of the mehndi action poses. Maybe that's how
Gab sold it: "Do the yoga with me. We'll call it yoga, but just do those
cool poses again."
Cute pout from Xena when Gabrielle merrily takes off. "Aw, rats. All right,
Argo, it's just you and me." Xena never sounded less thrilled with that
prospect - Argo should be insulted. It reminded me of Gab's temper tantrum
when Xena left her at the beginning of For Him the Bell Tolls.
Listen to one of Sophocles' bimbettes the first time they appear: "You're
much funnier than Euripides!" Because we met Euripides in Athens Academy of
the Performing Bards, we know that's not much of a compliment: nice guy, but
a barrel of monkeys he ain't.
Why did Gab have her scroll in the bathroom? I've heard of bathroom readers,
but bathroom writers? Or was Xena snitching parchment again?
OK, it's obvious, I know EVERYONE is saying it, but I gotta say it, too: the
casting call looked like it was STRAIGHT out of a convention costume
contest. For two seconds I started scanning faces just to make sure they
didn't actually shoot it at a con.
Why were we hearing Xena warcries when the auditioning was for Gabrielles?
Minya still has Xena's whip. And is getting better and better with it all
the time - nice smack of the Xena actress's feet!
Gabrielle is too pretentious to cast anyone but herself as herself, but will
grab the first acrobat to play Xena? No screen time for Xena? Gab says Xena
doesn't clobber skulls? Is Gab watching the same show we are? (Are the
writers?)
We see people who are obviously supposed to be Callisto and Ares, but we
never see them actually in the play.
Scene 84? Act 8?? How long was this play, 15 hours?
The hot tub was one long, running subtext gag. A hot tub for sex! Center
stage for an eyeful! Open the curtain on a Xena-Gab smooch (look for it) and
wet jokes!
Listen to the new title of the play as Joxer hangs its handbill: "Faster,
chakram! Kill kill kill!"
Why was this resolution so lame? Xena shows up to save the day, which could
have been explained so easily if Xena said she came back to see opening
night and then spotted the trouble. But instead we find out that the "Queen
of Cons" (has she met Rafe, her intended?) is apparently such a dumb con
artist that her name is commonly known and she lets it be plastered across
the playbills. But then again, the Queen is apparently only recognized by
Xena. So either she's a very bad queen of cons, or hasn't settled into the
title yet.
The new Way of Love Gabrielle's kick-butt fighting method: run and hide in
wings. I'm SO depressed.
The thespian gag was kinda funny, especially Xena and Gabrielle's debate
about it afterwards. ("She DID say 'thespian,' right?") It would have been a
lot funnier if it hadn't already been done, and done more deftly, two
seasons ago in Warrior... Princess... Tramp. ("It will only work if you're a
convincing thespian!" "Hey, you never said nothin' about no kinky stuff.")
Final line of the show: "I'm going to tell my brother!" Would that be Jet?
Or Sam Raimi, whose name appeared during
the line?
Best gags of the episode:
"I'm not drunk, I just trip over things like that!"
Dustinus Hoffmanus, the difficult method actor
The animal growl with the deadpan shot of Gab's
steamed face.
"What about the critics?" "It'll kill 'em all!"
(A little too much time around the ex-warlord,
Gab! That one put me on the floor for the
first half of the commercial break.)
"Interactive theater! Everybody join in!"
(Gab's smartest moment of the episode)
"There's the opening of Buffus the Bacchae Slayer
across the street." (HA! Hey, it's only fair;
Buffy mentioned Xena a whole season ago.)
COMMENTARY 3:
03-24-99. Commentary Xorys.
I don't think this ep exactly calls for a massive theoretical
overview. It does seem to me that the ep continues a trend, started, I
think, by Fins, Femmes and Gems, whereby comedy eps are not so much actual
XWP eps themselves, as skits or spoofs *about* XWP, which just happen to
use the actual cast. Earlier comedy eps, such as Warrior...Princess or the
much later Been There Done That, and to an even greater extent eps which
mixed comedy and serious elements, such as The Greater Good and The Furies,
were funny, but also functioned as actual XWP eps... they seemed to exist
more or less consistently within the fictive world of the show, and they
seemed to contain the actual characters from the show. Whereas with the
more recent comedy eps, there seems to have been an increasing trend to
"stepping outside the frame" of the show... so the circumstances are
barely, if at all, consistent with the regular fictive world of the show,
the regular characters are portrayed more as exaggerated spoofs or parodies
of themselves, and significant elements of the humour draw on making fun of
the show itself, and elements of popular culture related to it, requiring
the viewer to suspend suspension of disbelief, and stay aware that they are
watching a TV parody, in order to "get" the joke...
Now, that said, I have to say that I found The Play's The Thing *very*
funny. In fact I probably laughed out loud at it more than I have at any
other XWP ep. TPTB certainly showed in this one that they're prepared to
make fun of pretty much everything about the show, themselves, the fans...
but whilst much of it was wickedly funny, I didn't find any of it negative
or mean-spirited, and I was quite happy to laugh along with it. Plus I've
dabbled in (amateur) dramatics from time to time, and have a real weakness
for anything set in the world of theatre.
I suppose the other thing that calls for some overview comment is the
treatment of Gab in this ep. I have to admit that whilst I identify heavily
with Xena, my perspective on Gab's character has always been very much as
an outsider, with never more than a partial ability to understand her... so
I suppose those who identify heavily with Gab may perceive this ep
differently to me. For me Gab was not really presented inconsistently in
this ep... but she was certainly exaggerated for comic effect. So
everything we saw did reflect elements of Gab's personality as it has been
presented all along, but these personality traits were played large,
deliberately blown out of proportion, in order to feed the humour. I have
to say that this didn't really annoy me (although I'm being a bit
defensive, because I guess it may have annoyed others...) In a way I found
the recognition of these traits in treating them comically this way
reassuring - given the degree of awareness about Gab's character that the
humour in this ep showed, it seems less likely that TPTB will fall into the
traps they seem to have been setting for themselves with the recent
development of her character. Am I making myself at all clear here? I guess
what I'm trying to say is that even though this ep was a bit cruel to Gab
in some ways, lampooning both her weaknesses and her aspirations, still I
felt that it reaffirmed an awareness of her character's humanity, and made
it clear that TPTB are unlikely to make the mistake of letting her become
some sort of plaster saint.
So, let's take our usual wander through the contents of the ep....
It's not terribly relevant to anything that happens in the ep, but we
should perhaps start by noting that the title comes from Shakespeare's
great tragedy Hamlet... Hamlet's father, the King of Denmark, has been
secretly murdered by his Uncle Claudius, who has assumed the throne...
Hamlet knows of the murder because his father's ghost has appeared and told
him of it... he encounters a band of wandering players and hires them to
put on a play at the royal court, depicting a king being murdered by his
brother, in circumstances identical to Claudius' murder of Hamlet's
father... Hamlet hopes thus to be able to confirm Claudius' guilt by
watching his reaction (Hamlet doesn't entirely trust the ghost)... and
within this context Hamlet utters the line "the play's the thing / Wherein
I'll catch the conscience of the king."
Apart from the title, I don't see that this ep bears any particular
relation to Hamlet. What it clearly does bear a fairly close resemblance to
is the 1968 Mel Brooks film The Producers, which starred Zero Mostel and
Gene Wilder... that movie had a very similar plot to this ep, where Wilder
and Mostel play theatrical producers who hit on a scheme for making money
by producing a play that is sure to fail... and the title they come up with
for their sure-fire failure is Springtime For Hitler...
(your
eyes)... this is pretty much the only Indian music in this ep - I wonder if
it will be the last Indian music we get to hear on X:WP, now that India
itself has been left behind...?
Xena and Gab *both* seem to be doing Yoga now... or at least I suppose that
statuesque Indian pose Xena was assuming was some form of Yoga...
Cute crown Gab had made herself from the flowers in the field - she seems
to like that sort of thing (it reminded me of her acceptance into Najara's
"way of light" - but not her, apparently).
So Gab has left her scroll somewhere in Piraeus and Xena has to go and help
the Prince in Arcon. I always find the place names they come up with
intriguing, if sometimes rather challenging. Piraeus was a very famous city
in the ancient world - it was the main port of Athens, situated on a
peninsula, about 5 miles from Athens itself. I don't know of any special
association between Piraeus and the theatre, although Athens itself was the
source of pretty much all the Greek drama that survives to us. And there
wasn't any sign that the "Piraeus" (or "Parius" as the CC had it) that we
saw in this ep was a port of any kind. Arcon, OTOH, whilst sounding like a
fairly probable place name, doesn't correspond to an ancient Greek town or
province that I know of.
I thought the "Well when I say 'Don't mention it'..." thing was kind of
silly and overdone - I really don't care for it when they just sort of
discard Xena's character to have her clown around like this in comedy eps.
And they really hammered this one into the ground, right down to the "...
Ah rats! Alright Argo, it's just you and me..." Fortunately, from my point
of view, this was about the worst bit in the whole ep... so I was spared
another In Sickness And In Hell (which I felt would have been better not
made, because it was full of this sort of thing).
BTW, I see Argo has conveniently been picked up from wherever she was
parked whilst they were in India (even though, in In Sickness And In Hell,
Xena promised not to leave Argo behind again...)
I loved the "You're a *lot* funnier than Euripides!" line that we heard one
of the hangers on saying! Of course, this joke only really makes sense when
you're rewatching the ep, and you know the character being addressed is
Sophocles. Sophocles and Euripides are both mainly remembered as writers of
great tragedies, so the question of which of them is "funnier" is probably
moot... however Euripides tended to treat his characters in a more
down-to-earth and human way, so a certain humour might be found in some of
his work, whereas it would be hard to point to much of a risible nature in
the extant works of Sophocles.
Perhaps we might digress a moment here on the subject of Greek dramatists
and XWP... Sophocles was born around 495 BCE, and Euripides about 15 years
later (so they'd both be pretty long in the tooth, for example, in the time
of Julius Caesar). OTOH, we saw Euripides previously in Athens City Academy
Of The Performing Bards, at which time he appeared to be perhaps a little
younger than Gab herself... based on which, we might expect Sophocles to be
about 15 years or a little less older than Gab - in which case, he isn't
wearing very well at all, based on his appearance in The Play's The Thing.
We were also told, in Death In Chains, that Gab knew all the works of
Sophocles off by heart... and I rather got the impression he was considered
to be dead at the time. Which would be fairly reasonable, since in
Forgiven, Gab mentioned (in the charades game) the play Iphigenia In Aulos,
which Euripides wrote in his old age... Time and tide may wait for no one -
but they're certainly pretty darned flexible in the Xenaverse!
Of course they make the intended Hollywood parallel quite clear with
Sophocles' departing line: "She'll never work in this town again..."
"I'm not drunk - I just trip over things like that!" - a rare moment of
honest self perception from Joxer, there.
"Wow! Gabrielle! Your hair! Did that hurt? What's that you're wearing?"
"Sari" "Don't apologise - it looks good!" Well, I suppose this joke was
inevitable, so we might as well get it over with! Actually what Gab is
wearing now bears fairly little resemblance to a sari - the skirt, which
would normally be ankle length, has retreated to mid-thigh, and the top,
wrap-around portion, which should be broad (about 45 inches, normally) and
all-of-a-piece with the skirt, has now degenerated into a token detached
scarf. Only the blouse is still pretty much like the standard Indian
garment. The overall result does look a little like what poor Indian women
doing manual work in dirty conditions sometimes wear - but it shows far
more skin... And Joxer's mistaking the "mehndi" for tattoos was certainly
perfectly reasonable, since it looks far more like tattooing than it does
like any mehndi I've ever seen.
I see Joxer's still on his thing about Gab's feelings for him... I thought
he might have got over this, since he didn't even comment on her absence in
Key To The Kingdom, and although she was the Princess in his version of the
tale, he didn't seem too struck in If The Shoe Fits...
"Piraeus is the great Appian Way - you know I could spend a week going to
all these plays..." Now why Gab should say that Piraeus is "the great
Appian Way" as a way of indicating that it's a centre for theatre I just
don't see. The Appian Way, or Appia Via, was perhaps the most famous of
Roman roads, connecting Rome with southern Italy. Gab might well be aware
of it (its construction was started before 300 BCE, and it continued in use
throughout the time of the Roman Republic and the Empire), but I don't
believe it ever had any association with drama. Of course, I assume they're
just punning on the fact that Broadway is referred to as "the great white
way" (and why is that, BTW?)
"Yeah - I love theatre myself... Euripacles and Sopho...more." "Euripides.
Sophocles." "Yeah, those guys too..." Well heck, if a joke's been working
for decades, where's the need to change it much!
And Gab wants Sophocles to be her mentor, because his writing is 'perfect'
- well, she knows it all by heart, according to Talus...
So let me get this straight... Gab is very attached to this scroll, but she
left it in the can?
Jennifer Ward-Lealand is clearly quite the versatile actor (well I gather
she does major work on the stage in NZ, apart from her TV and film
stuff...) She didn't remind me of Boadicea at all here... indeed, if I
hadn't been forewarned by the TV Guide description, I don't know that I
would have even realised it was the same person. OTOH, I did find her
portrayal of Zera distinctly reminiscent of Jamie Lee Curtis in comic roles
(e.g. A Fish Called Wanda, True Lies...)
Gab always has been a sucker for a combination of appeals to her vanity and
to her desire to save the world...
Where does Humongous come from? We haven't heard of him before, have we? I
was thinking of the video game - but that's "Horrungus" or something, isn't
it?
"Athen's Academy Theatre presents Sophocles' 'The Women Of Trachis' Titan
Playhouse, direct from Rome, ' A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To The
Acropolis', Original Cast! By-The-Gods Performing Arts Center, 30th Smash
Week! 'Oh Zeus' A Divine Comedy. Laugh or be smitten!" Good stuff, eh?
Several chuckles there. I particularly liked the "By-The-Gods Performing
Arts Center". And the pun on Divine Comedy isn't bad either (although I
don't suppose ancient Greeks would get the reference to Dante). "The Women
Of Trachis" is an actual play by Sophocles... one of only seven out of well
over hundred which he wrote to have survived. It is perhaps the least well
known of Sophocles' surviving works (unless perhaps Philoctetes is even
less well known). It tells the story of the tragic end to the marriage of
Hercules (well Heracles to the Greeks) and Deianira... as a result of doubt
and misunderstanding they both die horrible deaths. Not exactly a barrel of
laughs...
So Zera believes in the "auteur theory", eh? This refers to the idea,
generally attributed to the French (hence the French word "auteur",
meaning, basically, "author"), that a film should essentially be the
creation of a single person, whose creative intelligence controls every
aspect of what ultimately appears on the screen... (Stanley Kubrick was a
well known non-French believer in this theory.)
If that poster Joxer was putting up said "Open Casting Call... Gabrielle
and Xena: A Message Of Peace", then the language used must be very
concise... there only appeared to be four words on the entire poster - a
big one at the top, a big one at the bottom, and two small ones in the
middle. And what about telling folks where and when the 'casting call' is?
And why am I not surprised that Gab's name is first...?
I love the line-up of look-alikes, complete with mutterings of "I have many
skills" and war-cries! Definitely a nod (or something) at the fans, there.
I thought it was quite sweet though - I enjoyed seeing the look-alikes,
just as I always enjoy seeing those who have the courage, sense of theatre,
and inventiveness to dress up for fan gatherings. (The closest I've ever
ventured myself was an impromptu "follower of Dahak" outfit...)
And of course, Gab can't cast Gabrielle at all because of the "subtlety to
the character", but OTOH, she casts the first person who tries out for
Xena: "Xena requires more of an athlete..." They were definitely letting
themselves have quite a bit of fun here, eh? I guess Gab shares Stephen
Sears' view that she's really the hero of the show...
I thought the play Xena was... well, very striking. She reminded me of
someone, but I can't quite place who (certainly not Xena though!) She was
terrific in the role... really capturing the inept enthusiasm, whilst being
very sympathetic. (Polly Baigent, who played her, is quite an athlete
really, and has been one of Lucy's regular doubles for Xena since right
back near the start of the show...)
"I can too shoe a mule! Shoo!" Touche! (Another old joke, mind you...)
Dustinus Hoofmanus the centaur, indeed! "I do not play quadrupeds!" "I am
an actor - I *refuse* to limit myself!" And this was another rather
inspired piece of casting, since Dustin was played by Peter Muller, who
played one of the most famous Centaurs in the Xenaverse, Deric, whose wife,
Lyla, Lucy Lawless played in the HTLJ eps As Darkness Falls and The Outcast.
Gab say "Sophocles is the master of prose!" This is a slightly odd
pronouncement, since, so far as we know, Sophocles wrote entirely in verse...
The scam Zera is working (apart from being borrowed from The Producers) is
pretty much the oldest there is - but hey, this is *ancient* Greece...
Why the heck was the play Xena cleaning her nails with a modern carpet knife?
I quite liked the look of the play Ares too, especially the beard (g) -
it's a pity he didn't get any lines...
"Only one person can fully capture the spiritual essence of Gabrielle..."
Yeah, yeah, Gab... As Minya said, "as if we didn't see *that* coming!"
And Dustinus Hoofmanus gets to play King Wences? What, as in "good King
Wences last looked out"? (Well that's what I always thought it was as a
kid... but then when we sang "When a knight won his spurs in the stories of
old... For god and for valour he rode through the land" I always thought
that "Valour" was the name of the knight's girlfriend... and let's not even
talk about Gladly, the cross-eyed bear!)
"The warlord Humongous is behaving in a destructive way... no doubt as a
result of his impoverished upbringing and other societal factors beyond his
control..." "Come. Sit down. We wish to give you A MESSAGE OF PEACE."
"Okay." Great stuff, eh?
"Maybe if we just had a different title..." "Like what? Springtime For
Warlords?" Hmm... I guess Gab must have seen The Producers - maybe during
one her jaunts into her future lives.
"Blood, Guts and Babes" Or Minya's suggestion, "Wild Men In Rubber"
(Hmmm... she certainly has eclectic tastes...) Or perhaps my favourite,
"Big Boys In Boxers"
"Well, well, well! Aren't you all ashamed of yourselves...?" This is pretty
much a requisite scene in any "putting on a play" drama. BTW, if you have
any taste at all for this kind of thing, then let me recommend a couple of
fairly recent films you *really* should see. Kenneth Branagh's "A
Midwinter's Tale" (also known as "In The Bleak Midwinter") is a cheap
little film, shot in B&W, about a bunch of people trying to put on Hamlet
in a disused church in England. It pretty much included all the cliches of
the genre, but it's also, IMO, a *great* movie, the best thing Branagh's
done. Julia Sawalha (Saffy in Absolutely Fabulous) co-stars, and is
terrific... but the whole cast is excellent. Another not-to-be-missed
theatrical drama is Christopher Guest's Waiting For Guffman. This one is as
American as Midwinter's Tale is British... and is a hilarious, loving,
dead-on tribute to amateur theatre. Interestingly enough, both these films
are somewhat examples of the "auteur theory", each being directed by its
writer. OK, sorry... back on topic (hopefully)
OK, I wasn't quite right about the opening music being the only Indian
music in this ep - when Gab is doing yoga and assuring herself "I have
inner peace. I *can* work with amateurs!", we hear the sitar and the
bansuri playing. And BTW, when did Gab suddenly get to be a theatre
"professional"? "Working with amateurs" indeed!
"A little eye-candy. What's the harm? It doesn't affect the vision thing...
it's all still the same..." Methinks TPTB are sending up their own
production style more than a little here...
Oh whoops! Apparently Dustinus' character is called King Whatsis, not King
Wences...
"These are your changes? Blood? Sex?" "And a... hottub. I got the guys
working on it in the back..." Can't help loving this stuff. (Also can't
help thinking that the writers of this ep, who I've never heard of before,
must have more than a passing familiarity with fandom...)
"Artists aren't supposed to care what the public wants... we aren't doing
this for money!" "Well I am..." "So am I..."
So Gab goes off to ask Sophocles' advice, "artist to artist" - but the
current production of Sophocles' "Women Of Trachis" appears to be being
produced by Busby Berkeley, with a little help from Sam Peckinpah... and
the special effects, with one guy's head knocked off, while the other guy
is cut in half, are pretty "state of the art" for ancient Greek theatre.
And Sophocles, of course, turns out to be the boor from Gab's arrival in
Piraeus.
So Gabs has a try at rationalising putting on a commercial production: "A
message means nothing if no one hears it. A flower in the forest is just a
plant if no one sees it..."
"What about the critics?" "It'll kill 'em all!"
And now the play's name is changed to "Faster Chakram! Kill, Kill, Kill!"
This just about had me in hysterics, I must admit. For any who don't
recognise it, this is a homage to one of the biggest schlockmeisters ever
to work in American cinema, Russ Meyer, and specifically to his 1965 opus
"Faster Pussycat! Kill! Kill!" I don't entirely know what to say about this
film... in some ways it's absolutely dreadful, but still if you haven't
seen it, I'd have to recommend that you do... and I suppose in a strange
and twisted way, it could almost be seen as an antecedent of Xena.
Unless I'm mistaken, the poster *next* to the one Joxer was putting up for
Gab's play appeared to have been illustrated by William Blake, the 18th
century artist and poet - well it wasn't very clear, but it certainly
looked like his style...
Xena defeated Cleon twice and humiliated him. When? I thought this was a
reference to something in an actual ep, but now I'm not at all sure, since
I can't place it...
I wasn't too sure about the wood nymphs, or whatever they were supposed to
be, singing about the "action-packed tale of Xena. Xena! Xena! Xena,
Warrior Princess! Oooh!" (G) (Actually I thought it was kind of cute...)
And couldn't they have managed some kind of body stockings or towels or
something for the hottub scene? (Believe me, bathing in leather is *not* a
good idea...)
"Oh, the power, the passion, the danger... the blood... the " - Kaelus seems to
be in tune with what this is all about...
"If the play's a success, we're d.." "Don't say the delta word!" What?
Doomed? Debtors? Discombobulated?
"We have to get Gabrielle back to that boring, pretentious, heavy-handed
material we fell in love with..." Ouch! A bit hard on poor old Gab, eh?
"I don't care how much money we lose - it's going to be peace, love and
changing the world..." (Which isn't exactly very generous, considering that
none of it is her money in the first place...)
The writing in this ep, e.g. on the posters and marquees, looked more like
actual Greek lettering, rather than the random sigils they usually use -
but I don't really read Greek, so I couldn't make much out from it. And, of
course, the name of the theatre, "Apollo", was in Roman lettering. Did
anyone make any sense of any of the "Greek"?
"Criticus from Varietus is in the audience" - presumably a pun on
"Variety"... I had great trouble making this line out though - I had no
idea *what* Joxer was talking about the first time I watched the ep.
I didn't really understand why Cleon was wandering around backstage hitting
people over the head... I thought his motivation was supposed to be
something to do with learning Xena's secrets...
I liked some of the little "theatrical" touches - like the way that when
Gab stepped out from between the curtains, the spot came on in the wrong
place, and she had to walk sideways into it. That is *so* "amateur theatre"!
"Joxer!" "Danger! Violence! Blood!" "No... that was the good version..."
"We will bring him A MESSAGE OF PEACE!" I loved the cardboard dove!
"Oh go away! You're not even a good actress!" "Now that was a little
uncalled for!" Fun little ironies here - with all the "who's the actor",
"who's the stand-in", "who can really fight and who can't" stuff...
"I knew there'd be trouble when I saw the playbill - it listed Zera as the
contact... she's the Queen of ons!" OK, pardon me for a minute, but I see
a number of problems here... 1) If Xena was in Arcon helping the Prince,
*how* did she see the playbill? Did Joxer send some out by pigeon? 2) Well
I guess we just have to allow that Xena is a sort of walking "Criminal
Records Office" and has the name of every miscreant in the known world on
file in her brain, but 3)If Zera is known as "The Queen of Cons", doesn't
it ever occur to her, for Zeus' sake, to use a *false* name?! I guess these
ancient Greek criminals just weren't too sophisticated...
Have we ever seen Xena crack her knuckles before a fight before?
"Oooh! A Centaur!" I'm not quite sure what the point of this was... unless
it was a (sort of) reference to Tootsie...
"The play's not bad... I just don't buy that Xena." "There's the opening of
'Buffus, the Bacchae Slayer' across the street..." Hmm... returning the
complement, eh (since Xena has been mentioned on Buffy at least once...
"Couldn't she have come as Xena?")
"I was stupid... to think that people would want to hear about peace and
love, instead of sex and violence." "Well peace might be boring, but it's
all anybody really wants..." "Yeah... No one wants to be preached to. They
have to experience things for themselves." Hmm... Well I'm not too sure
about peace being "all anybody really wants"... Certainly, if you mean
civil peace, as opposed to war, yes, people want peace to live, for
themselves, and for those they love. But in general, people want more than
'peace' in their lives... "The grave's a fine and private place / But few,
I think, do there embrace..." And what can Gab really work out about people
not wanting to be preached to? Well, we shall have to wait until we see how
she handles herself in future dramatic eps... but if she bears in mind this
stuff about people experiencing things for themselves and not wanting to be
preached to, that would be a step in the right direction, IMO.
"Gabrielle... I want to thank you. I never would have met Paulina if it
wasn't for you! In fact the two of you made me realise something deep down
about myself that I guess I always knew, but just didn't dare admit...
Yes... I'm a thespian!" "Congratulations - you managed to touch *someone*!"
"That's not exactly what I had in mind. I wanted to change violent people
into people of peace. Not actors. That is what she said - right? Deep down
she's a thespian?" "Yeah. I mean... that's what she... *said*... Why?
What'd'ya think?" Well I certainly laughed at this... more than once,
actually. Although I'm left with a little ambivalence. TPTB certainly seem
prepared to laugh at themselves, so I guess they're entitled to laugh at
the fans. But somehow I sense something a little... I don't now...
'distancing' here. Or am I just being over-sensitive here? Quite possibly...
BTW, for any who are still somewhat confused, a "thespian" is a
practitioner of the theatrical arts, specifically an actor, so named for
the 6th century BCE Greek tragedian Thespis, who is reputed to have
introduced the use of individual actors to the drama (which previously
consisted only of choruses).
And poor old Joxer is left hanging again... I liked the way they actually
played his "I'm gonna tell my brother!" line right over Sam's Executive
Producer credit. They were definitely out to have a bit of fun with us in
this one... (Although, of course, *Joxer's* brother would be either Jett or
Jace... and I don't see any point in telling either of them - so presumably
this was just an out-of-character joke... bringing us back to the point
about how the comedy eps have become increasingly spoofs *about* the show...)
COMMENTARY 5:
03-24-99. Commentary Videntur.
In general, I thought this was a good episode except that I am never 100%
pleased
with “Xena-light” episodes; however, I liked the idea of Gabrielle going back
to the
way she was at the beginning of the Xena episodes - a bard that preaches
peace.
I also liked the idea of our hero saving the day at the end of the show.
I feel the episode definitely showed that messages must sometimes be packaged
differently from their contents if you want to obtain the attention of the
people you
are trying to direct the message to. Gabrielle wanted to preach peace;
however,
she had to package it in violence in order to obtain the attention of the
warlords who
she was trying to direct this message to. The question becomes, just how much
of your morals are you willing to give up in order to deliver your message.
Gabrielle
showed at the end that she was giving up too much and that if the message had
to
be packaged in something that was so far from the actual message, it wasn’t
worth
it. However, as Xena told Gabrielle, everyone really wants peace but just as
Gabrielle also stated, no one wants to be preached to. The episode definitely
shows
that the preacher of peace has a hard road to walk. The episode also shows
that if
people don’t want to change, neither the packaging nor the message will have
the desired effect. The violence of Gabrielle’s Play definitely drew the
attention of the Warlords but these were hard-core violent people who had no
intention of changing. As I mentioned last week, in cases like this, does it
takes violence to maintain peace? In this episode, it took Xena the Warrior
to use violence to bring back peace and restrain evil (the Warlords) showing
that at times violence must be used to maintain peace and restrain a greater
violence. The show also showed that even though Gabrielle is trying hard to
practice the way of love and peace, she is afterall human and tends to give
into the human flaws that affect all of us.
My favorite parts in this episode were in the beginning where Xena has hurt
feelings over Gabrielle not even looking back before she takes off and the
very end when
Xena saves the day. I also liked the way that Gabrielle felt no one could
play the part of Gabrielle but herself.
I would like to make a note that I like Xena with bangs and Gabrielle with
long hair and will be happy when the bangs and long hair come back. I also
wish that Xena would go back to her more feminine way of walking. Let me also
say that I hope this is the last of the “Xena-light” episodes. I like the
relationship between Xena and Gabrielle, but I honestly watch the show more
for its “Xena-action” than I do for its “Gabrielle-action”. Lately, the show
has been focusing on Gabrielle, her physical appearance and her “finding her
way.” This is all very nice, but as I have mentioned many times, the show is
called Xena, Warrior Princess and I prefer it when the focus is on Lucy
Lawless. ROC is a very attractive young lady; however, Lucy Lawless is
stunningly beautiful and definitely a woman that portrays power. The message
that Xena portrays is courage, confidence, knowledge and a woman that defends
her beliefs and the people she cares about without concern to her own safety -
all of which is carried out superbly by Lucy Lawless alias Xena. I know seven
of my friends who were definitely disappointed in the lack of Lucy Lawless’s
appearance in this episode. When the two actresses are put together the
chemistry is great and you have a great show. As I have said in a few of my
previous commentaries, I wish the writers would stop focusing on Gabrielle and
get back to Xena, Warrior princess - her adventures and her friendship with
her bard. I also wish Ares would come back into the picture because he was
indeed the coolest of all the gods portrayed so far.
WHERE HAVE I SEEN YOU BEFORE?
By Xorys.
03-24-99. So who was who in The Play's The Thing?
Well, you'll have to bear with me a bit here, because the cast of this ep
was fairly large, and frankly the cross-referencing of all their prior
roles and connections gets *very* complicated...
Jennifer Ward-Lealand, who play Zehra, the Queen of Cons, is, as most of
you probably know, married to Michael (Iolaus) Hurst. She has been
previously seen on XWP as Boadicea in The Deliverer. She also appeared in
the HTLJ ep All That Glitters as Voluptua. Jennifer is apparently a well
known stage actress in NZ, and she's no stranger to comedy, as she did a
stint on the Australian satirical sketch show "Full Frontal" (which can be
seen on some cable channels in North America).
Jennifer also appeared, as Isobel Kearney, on the NZ soap "Shortland
Street", which has featured *many* actors seen in the Xenaverse... here's a
partial list of Xenaverse denizens who've graced Shortland Street with
their presence: Lisa Chappell (Daughter #1 in Hercules and the Circle of
Fire, Lydia in Pride Comes Before A Brawl, Dirce in The King of Thieves and
The Wedding of Alcmene, Princess Melissa in War Brides, Queen Melissa and
Dirce in Hercules on Trial, and Melissa Blake in Yes Virginia There is A
Hercules and For Those of You Just Joining Us), Marton Csokas (Borias,
Khrafstar, Tarlus in Promises), Meighan Desmond (Discord), Paul Gittens
(Kaleipus in OOW and PI, Thanis in Protean Challenge, Lonius in Prince
Hercules), Dean O'Gorman (Iloran in The Gauntlet, Orion in ACAOTBP, Young
Iolaus on HTLJ and YH, Ruun in Prodigal Sister), Craig Parker (Sarpedon in
FHTBT, King Cleades in Key To The Kingdom), Jay Saussey (Dead Amazon in
AITST, Village Girl in Hercules and the Lost Kingdom, Oena in And Fancy
Free and Greece Is Burning), Danielle Cormack (Ephiny), Lisa Crittenden
(Hecuba in AFA), Mark Ferguson (Krykus in H&H and RN, Dagnine in OOW and
PI, John Smythe in TXS, Prometheus in Hercules and the Circle of Fire,
Hades in Hercules in the Underworld, Craesus in As Darkness Falls), Rebecca
Hobbs (Woman #1 in Ares, Elora in The Siege At Naxos, Katrina in Doomsday),
Murray Keane (Hower in ADITL, Tiber in Hercules And The Amazon Women,
Hermes in Porkules), Sarah Smuts Kennedy (Kara in Mercenary and Hercules On
Trial, Leandra in Love Takes A Holiday), Peter McCauley (Talmadeus in TGG,
Gekkus in Men In Pink, Ajax in War Wounds, Odin in Norse by Norsevest and
Somewhere Over Rainbow Bridge), Scott Michaelson (the horrible Apollo in
Top God and Reunions), Charlotte Pennington (the Sister in Mercenary),
Simon Prast (Nemos in COH, First Soldier in What's in A Name, Patronius in
The Wedding of Alcmene), Todd Rippon (Goliath in GK, Macon in Tsunami,
Malus the Hood in Hercules and the Lost Kingdom, Goudrin in The Festival of
Dionysus), Caleb Ross (Nico in A Rock and a Hard Place), David Stott (the
Boatman in Pride Comes Before A Brawl, Paraicles in All That Glitters,
Thief #1 in Mummy Dearest, Salmoneus Double in Genies and Grecians and Geeks).
Jennifer Ward-Lealand can be seen in quite a number of films too. Most
recently she appeared in the NZ horror movie about a serial killer, "The
Ugly", which is currently on video store shelves as a new release. This
movie also features Beth Allen (Vanessa/Pilee in DOP), Katrina Browne
(Mendala in WIR, Thelassa in LUATD, Siri in Prodigal Sister), Rebecca Hobbs
(Woman #1 in Ares, Elora in The Siege At Naxos, Katrina in Doomsday), Paul
Glover (Menticles in The Price, Josephus in What's in A Name, Brontus in
Let the Games Begin, Roberto Orci in Yes Virginia There is A Hercules,
Danaeus in Descent), Christopher Graham (Toxeus in DIC and MB, Slave Boss
in RN, Colchis in Porkules), Jon Brazier (Walsim in TDHD, Tarsis in VA,
Mercenary #2 in The Vanishing Dead, Jakar in The Outcast, Slave Trader in
The Fire Down Below, Trinculos in A Star to Guide Them), Michael Dwyer
(Theodorus in The Warrior Princess, Ruffian #1 in The Quest, Thug #2 in The
Festival of Dionysus), and Darien Takle (Cyrene, Xena's mother, in SOTP,
IS, and The Furies)... so, another one with a *lot* of familiar faces for
Xenites.
Jennifer can also be seen in the 1993 NZ film "Desperate Remedies", which
also features Kevin Smith (Ares), Lisa Chappell (see above), and Jennifer's
spouse Michael Hurst. Jennifer and Michael also both appear in the 1992 NZ
feature "The Footstep Man" - I haven't seen this one, but I'd certainly be
curious to... apparently Michael plays Henri de Toulouse-Lautrec in it!
"The Footstep Man" also features Sarah Smuts Kennedy (see above), Geoff
Snell (Herodotus, Gab and Lila's dad, in SOTP and AFA, Ellis [Willa
O'Neill's dad again] in And Fancy Free, Peasant #2 in Hercules and the
Circle of Fire, and Clytus in The Enforcer) and Grant McFarland (Ming Tzu
in The Debt, First Ruffian in Cave of Echoes).
Another NZ feature in which both Jennifer and Michael can be seen,
presumably looking noticeably more youthful, is the 1985 production
"Dangerous Orphans", which also has various other actors who would later
show up in the Xenaverse - Ian Mune (Menas Maxius in Gladiator, King Sidon
in The Apple), Grant Tilly (Toth in The Lady and the Dragon), Peter
Vere-Jones (King Silvas in ASC, Zeus in Judgement Day), Desmond Kelly
(Elkton in Dreamworker) and Tim Lee (the Regent of Skiros in HSCMA, Acestus
in ISAIH, Ilus in Hercules And The Amazon Women).
Jennifer can also be seen in the 1994 NZ short "A Game with No Rules", in
which she co-stars with Danielle Cormack (Ephiny).
And although Jennifer can't actually be seen in the 1994 feature "Heavenly
Creatures", she apparently worked on that production as an acting coach.
This film was one of Kate Winslett's first major acting gigs, and
personally I would highly recommend it (but with the
notation that it is based on a strange and tragic murder case, and may be
disturbing for some).
Zehra's unctuous sidekick Milo was played by Mark Hadlow. Mark has never
been seen in the Xenaverse before, but he has done some NZ film work,
predictably working with various folks familiar to us. Mark played the
Rugby Coach in the 1995 film "Bonjour Timothy", which was apparently some
kind of NZ/Canada co-production, and which starred Dean O'Gorman (Orion in
ACAOTBP, Young Iolaus on HTLJ and YH), and also featured Jay Saussey (Dead
Amazon in AITST, Village Girl in Hercules and the Lost Kingdom, Oena in And
Fancy Free and Greece Is Burning).
On the 1992 USA / NZ film "Absent Without Leave Mark" Mark worked with
Margaret Blay (who played the rather bad witness in LUATD).
Mark was also one of the main voice actors for the *very* odd 1989 NZ
puppet film "Meet the Feebles", for which Stuart Devenie (Asterius the
Magistrate in And Fancy Free, Count Von Verminhaven in Greece Is Burning,
and Kernunnos in Resurrection and Render Unto Caesar) also provided voices,
and on which George Port, who played the first Critic in The Play's The
Thing, worked as a puppeteer... "Meet The Feebles" is worth checking out -
but be warned, it is *not* a children's film!
Mark also worked on the 1984 NZ film "Constance", which starred Donogh Rees
(Frigga in Norse by Norsevest and Somewhere Over Rainbow Bridge, the voice
of Mnemosyne in Let There Be Light) in the eponymous role, and also
featured Yvonne Lawley (Gryphia in Key To The Kingdom, Woman in Hercules
And The Circle of Fire, Old Woman in Market in Hercules In The Underworld,
Alyssa in Beanstalks and Bad Eggs, the Norn in Norse by Norsevest and
Somewhere Over Rainbow Bridge) and William Kircher (the Prison Overseer in
LUATD).
Mark can be seen operating a machine gun in the 1983 feature "Nate and
Hayes", also known as "Savage Island". Also seen in this movie, a war film
set in the Pacific islands, are Grant Tilly (Toth in The Lady and the
Dragon) and Bruce Allpress. Bruce has appeared as Enos in Unchained Heart,
an Old Man in The Road to Calydon, Septus in Cast A Giant Shadow, Skouros
in Not Fade Away, Phidias in War Wounds, and Stouras in Redemption... and
he's also in more NZ made films than pretty much any actor - a very busy man.
Another NZ film in which Mark Hadlow can be seen is 1982's "The Scarecrow".
Bruce Allpress is in this one too. And so are Desmond Kelly (Elkton in
Dreamworker), Sarah Smuts Kennedy (see above), Yvonne Lawley (see above)
and Norman Forsey (King Lias in W.P and W.P.T1, Casca in BTDT, Megas the
old prisoner in Key To The Kingdom, Tiresias in The Road to Calydon, The
Festival of Dionysus and The Outcast). It's a thriller, aimed at younger
viewers.
Mark can also be seen the 1982 Sci-Fi adventure "Warlords of the 21st
Century", released in the USA as "Battletruck". And he was featured in the
1980 crime drama "Beyond Reasonable Doubt", which starred David Hemmings,
and featured the Xenaverse actors Grant Tilly (see above), Ian Watkin (the
Inn Keeper in Eye Of The Beholder, King Quallas in End Of The Beginning,
the Butcher in Porkules), Bruce Allpress (again..), Laurie Dee (the Tavern
Keeper in LUATD, Machus in Reign of Terror), and Bernard Moody (Drunk in
ACAOTPB, Old Drunk in The Festival of Dionysus, Old Man in What's in A
Name, Proprietor in Cast A Giant Shadow, Messenger in Monster Child In The
Promised Land, and Drunk [again] in Armageddon Now Part 1).
Alison Wall who played Minya, of course created this role in A Day In The
Life, and reprised it previously in The Quill Is Mightier. I wasn't able to
find out much else about her, except that she provided the voices for
Tethys and Mnemosyne in "Hercules and Xena - The Animated Movie: The Battle
for Mount Olympus".
Peter Muller who played the haughty centaur Dustinus Hoofmanus, was an
interesting choice for this role, since his main previous claim to fame in
the Xenaverse comes from playing one of the most famous centaurs of them
all, Deric, whose wife Lyla was played by Lucy Lawless in the HTLJ eps As
Darkness Falls and The Outcast. Peter also reappeared as Deric in The
Wedding of Alcmene. His only other role in the Xenaverse was as Gregor, the
fallen soldier, in the HTLJ ep Ares.
The only other credit I found for Peter was a NZ TV series called "City
Life", in which he appeared together with Katrina Browne, Lisa Chappell and
Donogh Rees (for all of whose Xenaverse roles, see above), and Charles
Mesure (Mercer in The Price, Darnelle in TDHD and Johnny Pinto in Yes
Virginia There is A Hercules).
The stage-struck warlord Therax the Terrible was played by Stephen Hall.
Stephen first appeared on XWP as Draco's ill-fated lieutenant Hector in
SOTP. When next we saw him he was playing the lugubrious warlord Thelonius
(always accompanied by his henchman Munk) in TQIM. And we last saw him as
the Captain in Tsunami. He's also encountered Hercules a few times, playing
Minion #2 in Hercules In The Underworld, the Lead Soldier in The Vanishing
Dead, and Purces in The Fire Down Below.
Stephen also has quite a few film credits. He played Ivan's mate in the
1996 NZ film "Broken English", which can now be found on video shelves.
This film also featured Marton Csokas (Borias, Khrafstar), Gilbert Goldie
(the Town Elder in LUATD, Nevus in Hercules And The Lost Kingdom) and
Amanda Rees (Mina in The Sword of Veracity, Marpessa in We'll Always Have
Cyprus).
Another NZ film worth checking out, if you haven't already seen it, is
1994's "Once Were Warriors" in which Stephen plays the Prosecuting Officer.
Taungaroa Emile (Ximenos in Ares, Linxus in Sky High), George Henare
(Hidsim in LM, Zarathustra in Let There Be Light and Redemption) and Ian
Mune (Menas Maxius in Gladiator, King Sidon in The Apple) also appear in
this feature.
Stephen also had a (fairly small) role in Jane Campion's acclaimed 1993
film "The Piano". Ian Mune is in this one too, as is the (nearly)
ubiquitous Bruce Allpress, and it also features Gordon Hatfield (the
Lieutenant in Unchained Heart, Seerus in Death in Chains, Rufinus in The
Furies, Minion #1 in Hercules In The Underworld, Temple Guard in The Wrong
Path, Freedom Fighter in Not Fade Away), Tamati Rice (Garel in The Price,
Vercinix in When in Rome), Jon Brazier (Walsim in TDHD, Tarsis in VA,
Mercenary #2 in The Vanishing Dead, Jakar in The Outcast, Slave Trader in
The Fire Down Below, Trinculos in A Star to Guide Them) and Stephen Papps
(Pylendor in Unchained Heart, Seer in OOW, Teles in The Road to Calydon,
Trilos in Protean Challenge, The Darkness in Norse by Norsevest and
Somewhere Over Rainbow Bridge).
Stephen appears as a French Naval Officer in a film that should be known to
all Xenites - 1992's "The Sinking of the Rainbow Warrior". This film, of
course, features Lucy Lawless in a pre-Xena role, and many others who later
brought to life inhabitants of the Xenaverse can be seen in it: Stig Eldred
(Titus in King Con, Minion Leader in Hercules In The Underworld, Belus in
The March to Freedom, Maceus in Cast A Giant Shadow), Alison Bruce (Melosa
in H&H, Postera in Gladiator), Mark Ferguson (Krykus in H&H and RN, Dagnine
in OOW and PI, John Smythe in TXS, Prometheus in Hercules And The Circle of
Fire, Hades in Hercules In The Underworld, Craesus in As Darkness Falls),
Nigel Harbrow (Koulos in TBW, Basculis in LM, Patrol Centurion in AGD,
Turkos in Gladiator), Donogh Rees (Frigga in Norse by Norsevest and
Somewhere Over Rainbow Bridge, the voice of Mnemosyne in Let There Be
Light), Simon Prast (Nemos in COH, First Soldier in What's in A Name,
Patronius in The Wedding of Alcmene), and (naturally) Bruce Allpress.
Stephen Hall played a Police Constable in the 1990 NZ feature "The
Grasscutter", in which Jon Brazier (see above) appeared as his sergeant,
and Joel Tobeck (King Beraeus in Promises, Strife in Encounter, When A Man
Loves A Woman, Judgement Day, End Of The Beginning and Armageddon Now,
Strife and David Scott Pollison in Yes Virginia There is A Hercules) played
a victim. Peter Vere-Jones (King Silvas in ASC, Zeus in Judgement Day) was
also in this film.
Therax's colleague and rival, Kaelus the Conqueror should probably have
looked familiar to Xenites too... he was played by William Davis, who we
last saw as the evil deputy-warlord Malik in Death Mask. William also
player Skirner in the HTLJ ep Atlantis.
And the third of the trio of warlords in this ep, Cleon, was played by
Mark Nua. I thought Mark looked *very* familiar... but I guess it must be
from HTLJ, since he hasn't appeared on XWP before, at least not in a
credited role. On HTLJ he has been seen several times in meaty roles,
playing Skoros in Gladiator, the Ogre in The Vanishing Dead, a Wrestler in
The Fire Down Below, Otus in Once A Hero, and the would-be hero Mong in
Hercules On Trial.
John McKee was credited as Rivus (I believe... the character name
spellings are especially hard to read in the end credits). He was the other
male actor - the one who said "Well... I am" when Gab said "We aren't doing
this for the money". John is perhaps best known as the unprepossessingly
named Scaberus from TQIM, where he spent the ep chasing after his kinsman's
sword. He also played Lord Menos, the head of one of the two rival houses,
in Been There Done That. On the Herc side John has been seen as Gredor in
Centaur Mentor Journey, and as "Fake Eryx the Boxer" Hercules In The
Underworld.
In addition to noting his role in Hercules In The Underworld, the Internet
Movie Database has him credited with roles in many major movies, including
the original Angels In The Outfield (1951) and the original Cape Fear
(1962)... but even though they include Hercules In The Underworld, I think
they must have got him confused with someone else, since I can't see that
he could possibly have been playing a Recording Man in 1949 and a Pilot,
2nd Bruiser and a Photographer in 1950 - unless he has some "Portrait of
Dorian Grey" deal going...
The First Critic was played by George Port. George has never acted in the
Xenaverse before, at least not in a speaking role.
He played an Orderly in the 1996 movie "The Frighteners", which starred
Michael J. Fox. This movie also featured Stuart Devenie (Asterius the
Magistrate in And Fancy Free, Count Von Verminhaven in Greece Is Burning,
and Kernunnos in Resurrection Render Unto Caesar) as the Museum Curator,
and Danny Lineham (Drinker #2 in The Warrior Princess, Grathios in The
Reckoning, Lycus in The Sword of Veracity, Johe in Prodigal Sister, and the
School Teacher in Let There Be Light).
George was also in the 1992 NZ offbeat horror movie "Braindead", also known
as "Dead Alive". Stuart Devenie (see above) was in this one too, and Chris
Ryan (Virgilius in TLW, Zantar/Evil Stepmother in ITSF) appeared in it as a
"Featured Party Zombie".
Besides these acting credits, George also worked as a digital effects
operator on "Heavenly Creatures" (discussed under Jennifer Ward-Lealand,
above), and as a puppeteer on "Meet the Feebles" (discussed under Mark
Hadlow, above).
Paulina, the play Xena, was played by Polly Baigent. Polly has been
previously credited as a "Doppelganger" in Dreamworker and "LL Body Double"
in Warrior...Priestess...Tramp. Although these are her only acting credits,
I believe she is one of Lucy's regular doubles...
Mary Henderson was credited as "Woman #2"... I *think* she was one of the
three "singing wood-nymphs", but I'm not entirely sure. She was previously
credited for the role of Kundin in the HTLJ ep The Fire Down Below.
The rest of the cast, Tammy Barker as the speaking Gabrielle look-alike,
Eduardo de Campos as Sophocles, Denis Hoskins as the Second Critic, Rietta
Austin as Woman #1, and Dee Wernham as Woman #3, were all receiving their
first credits in the Xenaverse, and I couldn't find out anything about
their other work.
The ep was written by Ashley Gable and Thomas A. Swyden, who are an
entirely new writing team to the Xenaverse, and about whom I could find out
nothing.
The director of the ep was Christopher Graves. He has never directed an
XWP ep before, but he has directed three HTLJ eps, all comedies: Two Men
And A Baby, Yes Virginia There is A Hercules, and Porkules.
MORE THINGS TO LOOK OUT
FOR
03-20-00. From Kim. Was just reading the latest on this episode, and found it odd that no one had mentioned the obvious rip-off (like BTDT and Groundhog Day) of 1968's "The Producers". It stars Zero Mostel and Gene Wilder as the "Zera n' Sidekick" characters who pull the exact same scam, and it won
the Academy Award for Best Screenplay that year. Those who liked this Xena ep just might want to check out The Producers.
04-14-99. From Kym. The "Buffus the Bacchae Slayer" reference in PLAY was made because the writers started out on "Buffy."
04-14-99. From Xorys. A couple of additional oddments about The Play's The Thing. These are actually based on comments from someone connected with the making of the episode... but the comments were off the record and not for attribution - so you'll have to just take them as you find them.
This Xena-lite ep was mostly made whilst Lucy was attending the NATPE
convention in Las Vegas (remember Regis & Kathy Lee), so she was only
available for a day or two of filming on it.
The name of the theatre town, Piraeus, was apparently chosen without any
knowledge that it was the main port of ancient Athens - they just picked a
place on the outskirts of Athens because TPTB wanted it to be like a
theatre suburb of a major city, close to Athens without being Athens itself.
OTOH the place where Xena spent most of the ep 'helping the Prince' was
Archon, which was a gratuitous and intentional Star Trek reference, as was
the name of the warlord Kaelus the Conqueror, named after Kahless, the
first Klingon Emperor. Now I'm not a Trekkie - someone tell me what Archon
was...?
The Kahless reference can also be found in another product of the writing
team, Ashley Gable and Thomas A. Swyden, the Buffy The Vampire Slayer ep
"I, Robot... You, Jane", in which the demon in the Internet was foiled by
forming the "Circle of Kayless"!
Xena's whole "Well when I say 'Don't mention it'..." schtick was not in
the original script... it got worked up somehow during the development and
filming...
Remember the "You're *much* funnier than Euripides" line? Well originally
there were plans for Euripides (previously seen in Athens City Academy Of
The Performing Bards) to actually appear in this ep... but they didn't pan
out.
Gabby's line "Piraeus is the great Appian Way" was definitely a reference
to Broadway, the Great White Way. Originally it was actually the "Great
White Appian Way", but it got shortened...
In the original script it was fairly clear that when Zera said she found
Gabby's precious scroll in the "little girls room" it was actually
fulfilling the function we have previously come to associate with scrolls
in that setting...
Humongous wasn't a reference to any particular character, in X:WP or
elsewhere - they just thought it would be funny because it means huge and
it sounds sort of like a Roman name...
The play title "A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To The Acropolis" was,
of course, a reference to "A Funny Thing Happened On the Way to the Forum".
This was again something of an in joke, since "A Funny Thing..." was
created by Larry Gelbart (who was also behind the M*A*S*H TV show), and the
writers of The Play's The Thing were working for Larry Gelbart last year,
doing stuff for the Showtime cable network.
Everyone caught the Dustinus Hoofmanus reference I guess. What we didn't
get was the name of the other male actor (played by John McKee, previously
Scaberus and Lord Menos). This character was credited just as Rivus, but
apparently his full intended name was Keanu Rivus... a real pity that one
didn't actually make it into the broadcast.
Several people have noted that this ep showed a lot of familiarity with
fan things... apparently the writers, Ashley Gable and Tom Swyden, could
definitely be considered fans of the show, and are indeed familiar with fan
culture (well it showed, didn't it?)
My memory didn't fail me when I failed to identify when "Xena defeated
Cleon twice and humiliated him"... they just made him up, using the real
ancient Greek name Cleon (there's a Cleon in Aristophanes' play "The
Knights", and there was also a historical Cleon who led a faction opposed
to Pericles in the Peloponnesian war).
I mentioned "Waiting For Guffman" and Kenneth Branagh's "A Midwinter's
Tale" as movies relevant as background to this ep. Apparently those putting
the ep together were well aware of these, and bore them in mind... and also
the Woody Allen film "Bullets Over Broadway" (an obvious parallel, with
gangsters financing a Broadway show), and the *excellent* theatrical farce
*about* people trying to put on a farce, "Noises Off" (a movie that just
makes me laugh *so* much... I own a copy of it).
I had complained (slightly) that I didn't really understand why Cleon was
wandering around backstage hitting people over the head, since his
motivation was supposed to be something to do with learning Xena's
secrets... Apparently he was meant to have overheard Gabrielle saying she
was changing the play back to her original vision about a message of peace,
and realised he wasn't likely to find out about Xena's battle tactics from
it... but somehow this got lost in the edit, or whatever.
Apart from the obvious issue of the line "There's the opening of 'Buffus,
the Bacchae Slayer' across the street..." returning the compliment, since
Xena was mentioned on Buffy last year, there's a more pointed in-joke
there, since the writers of this ep, Gable and Swyden, used to write for
Buffy. (Now who wrote the Buffy ep that mentioned Xena...?)
03-24-99. From Dark12. I was just looking through my copy of Hamlet for my english class and I spotted that line. At the end of Act 2, Hamlet has this big ol' sololiloquy and the last two lines go:
"More relative than this:--the play's the thing
Wherein I'll catch the conscience of the king."
This is the part in Hamlet where Hamlet decides to arrange a
play called "The Murder of Gonzago" to be shown at the castle
and for the new king, Claudius (his father's brother), to see. Hamlet
suspects that Claudius murdered his father, Hamlet the First, who was
king at the time. The play is doctored a bit by Hamlet to show the
circumstances of his father's death, and Hamlet will watch for Claudius'
reaction to it to ascertain whether or not Claudius is guilty.
Don't know whether or not this has anything to do with the upcoming ep,
but just throwing in my quarter-dinars worth.
TRANSCRIPT
Click here to read a transcript of THE PLAYS THE THING .
DISCLAIMER:
Although no great literary works of art were harmed or plagiarised, a few thespians stole some scenes during the production of this motion picture.
