Introduction (01)
Kristien's Head (02-169)
Kristien's Stories
Acknowledgments
Articles
Biography

What are 'frames'? Heck, I don't even know what a 'website' is!

Introduction

^[01] I call this bard "Lawls," because that's who she is to me. She is so fun, great to know, and the first one to honor me by using my name in one of her hilarious Turnip stories. She is talented, and a nice person to talk to. She's also the one who gives all the new bards their breaks.

Kristien's Head

INTERVIEWER:
^[02] Why did you start writing?

KRISTIEN DAMON:
^[03] In a word, freedom. Since I wrote my first prose roughly 25 years ago, writing has been a way to simply escape real life for a while. I love that feeling of slipping into a totally different world from my own, a place where all the day-to-day worries and cares just fade away. I feel free to be, say, and do whatever I want through the character(s) in a story.

INTERVIEWER:
^[04] If you had to do it all over, would you be a bard? Would you write?

DAMON:
^[05] Of course, it's fun and most of my experiences with it thus far have been very positive. I've met some wonderful people through indulging in this pastime, and it's rather nice to actually have some fans of my own.

INTERVIEWER:
^[06] Give us a brief day in the life of Kristien.

DAMON:
^[07] Get up; go to work; come home; spend as much time with my love, family, and friends as I can; try to find time for myself to read, meditate, write, exercise; go to bed. Pretty dull, huh?

INTERVIEWER:
^[08] How do you handle stress?

DAMON:
^[09] Fan fiction reading and writing, meditation, and exercise.

INTERVIEWER:
^[10] Years from now, how would you want to be remembered?

DAMON:
^[11] As a person with a big heart, caring and giving, with honesty and integrity, and willing to fight tooth and nail for the underdog and causes she believed in.

INTERVIEWER:
^[12] What is your pet peeve?

DAMON:
^[13] Stop lights!

INTERVIEWER:
^[14] Who is Kristien?

DAMON:
^[15] An adventurous, headstrong yet sensitive, pensive soul who loves music, nature, good wine, quiet sunsets, and someone who's quite frankly still searching for a lot of the answers for who she is.

INTERVIEWER:
^[16] What is the most sensitive part on your body?

DAMON:
^[17] Bottoms of my feet.

INTERVIEWER:
^[18] What do you see yourself doing in the future? Any future projects?

DAMON:
^[19] Writing a novel.

INTERVIEWER:
^[20] How do you handle depression?

DAMON:
^[21] Face it head on and kick it's b*tt!

INTERVIEWER:
^[22] What was the hardest thing you ever did?

DAMON:
^[23] Bury my sister.

INTERVIEWER:
^[24] What was the easiest?

DAMON:
^[25] Fall in love.

INTERVIEWER:
^[26] What advice can you give to future writers?

DAMON:
^[27] Just write what you feel and what you know. Be true to it by putting a little bit of you in everything you write.

INTERVIEWER:
^[28] What has the show Xena meant to you?

DAMON:
^[29] It's been a wonderful experience and I'm extremely thankful these talented and artistic people decided to make it and share it with me. It drew me in from the beginning and I've come to love these characters as I would any dear friends. They've made me laugh, cry, spit venom, and squirm in my seat. I've never seen anything like it and I feel like I probably won't again, such uniqueness is surely a one-time deal. It's inspired me, it's brought me to find new friends, and it's been a big part of my life just about every week for the past five years.

INTERVIEWER:
^[30] How do you feel about its end?

DAMON:
^[31] I will truly miss it. I feel like I've lost a friend, and surprisingly it hurts more than I thought it would. There will never be another one like it.

INTERVIEWER:
^[32] What are your dreams? Hopes? Wishes?

DAMON:
^[33] A long healthy life for my love, my family, my friends, and me.

INTERVIEWER:
^[34] Who do you trust?

DAMON:
^[35] Myself and God.

INTERVIEWER:
^[36] What would you say every writer needs?

DAMON:
^[37] A spirited imagination and a gigantic coffee pot.

INTERVIEWER:
^[38] Do you believe in prayer?

DAMON:
^[39] Yes, if one is thankful, one should let someone know about it. I believe that many of my prayers have been answered in the past, even though I may have missed the answer because it came in the slightest of ways and I've not seen it until much later after I've had a quiet moment or two to think back upon the experience. I know that in my darkest of moments, someone or something has helped me pull on my bootstraps and right myself again. Faith and prayer, no matter what form it may take, in my opinion, maintains the humility in being human and subsequently the human in humanity.

INTERVIEWER:
^[40] How do you feel about subtext?

DAMON:
^[41] It does a body good of course. Actually, I think if it's well presented through dialogue and actions, and it walks the thin line without falling to far to one side or the other, it can really be a lot of fun trying to read between those lines, making of it what you will.

INTERVIEWER:
^[42] What makes your best friend your best friend?

DAMON:
^[43] Honesty, integrity, trust, companionship, and laughs.

INTERVIEWER:
^[44] What's the most romantic thing anyone has done for you?

DAMON:
^[45] Sat for hours, saying nothing, simply holding my hand.

INTERVIEWER:
^[46] What theme would you like to tackle in your next work?

DAMON:
^[47] I'd like to try a true uber piece. A murder mystery with many twists.

INTERVIEWER:
^[48] What was the last thing that made you smile recently?

DAMON:
^[49] Yancy Butler [Sara Pezzini in Witchblade] doing a cool eyebrow arch, twice in one show. You go girl!

INTERVIEWER:
^[50] What made you angry?

DAMON:
^[51] All right, I'll admit it, the Xena series finale. That's all I'll say about that.

INTERVIEWER:
^[52] You now have absolute authority over the world. Omnipotent in all areas. What's your first move?

DAMON:
^[53] Get rid of stoplights. Actually, I'd probably wipe out AIDS and cancer, then make sure every child has a loving home and enough food to eat.

INTERVIEWER:
^[54] How would you categorize your best writing?

DAMON:
^[55] Writing that's honest, soulful, and true to the characters, and which carries its theme clearly and concisely with good readability throughout from start to finish. Several of my personal favorites, and which I feel are my best works are:

If At First you Don't Succeed
Attention Shoppers
Do You Know
The Gift
Teach Me Everything You Know

INTERVIEWER:
^[56] What stupid thing did you do as a teen?

DAMON:
^[57] Stole a motorcycle for a couple of hours and went for a joyride. Brought it back in one piece though. All right, I was a bit of a rebel, but I grew out of it. Yeah, right.

INTERVIEWER:
^[58] Tell me why you have a fetish for turnips?

DAMON:
^[59] Ask Lariel, it's her fault.

INTERVIEWER:
^[60] What, if anything, can stop you writing, if only for a while?

DAMON:
^[61] Distress in my personal life can cause my muse to close up shop and flee to the farthest reaches of the earth, or of my mind.

INTERVIEWER:
^[62] In your opinion, do you fit your astrological sign?

DAMON:
^[63] To a tee! I'm a Sagittarian: adventurous, frank, always giving an honest opinion, happy-go-lucky, having a good memory for detail but often misplacing my possessions, and impulsive. I've been told that it's the spirit of the human upper half of the centaur/archer that yearns to know all the answers and to find the truth that will set us free. That would explain why I can never seem to find enough time to fully ponder everything life has offered me thus far because I'm always on the search for more, more, more. Oh, and I love chocolate too.

INTERVIEWER:
^[64] What to you is the worst feeling in the world?

DAMON:
^[65] Losing a loved one. Oh, and seasickness ranks right up there too.

INTERVIEWER:
^[66] The best feeling in the world?

DAMON:
^[67] Looking into the eyes of my lover as I bring her to ecstasy, and putting the finishing touches on a great fan fiction story.

INTERVIEWER:
^[68] Favorite song of the moment?

DAMON:
^[69] Let's Make Love, Tim McGraw and Faith Hill

INTERVIEWER:
^[70] What is the first thing you think of in the morning?

DAMON:
^[71] Calling my love and wishing her a great day. Then brushing my teeth. Not that there's a connection between the two.

INTERVIEWER:
^[72] Is there one part of the writing process where you usually get stuck? What have you tried to change that, successful or not?

DAMON:
^[73] I tend to over edit my own work. If I allow myself enough time I'll end up rewriting an entire story from beginning to end, possibly four or five times. So, I have to put the breaks on at some point. I've found that some of my best-received stories have been my least edited, those that I've just gone with my initial gut instinct.

INTERVIEWER:
^[74] Does the best writing flow for you, or does it come from rewrites?

DAMON:
^[75] I've found that my best writing just flows, and there have been times I've been writing and totally lost the rest of the world and any sense of time. There are just the characters, the keyboard, and me. Usually, these stories require little to no rewrites.

INTERVIEWER:
^[76] Which part of writing do you enjoy most and why?

DAMON:
^[77] All of it. But, I enjoy most getting the initial inspiration, however and wherever it may come to me. What a rush!

INTERVIEWER:
^[78] How often do you think about a piece when you're working on it and when do you think about it?

DAMON:
^[79] Each story is different. If the story is flowing, I don't have time to stop and think about it, it just comes. The thinking enters in during the read over and editing stage. I love those kind of writing experiences. But, I am working on a story right now that is not flowing so well. Therefore, I'm forced to think about it because I need to come up with a plan to get from point A to point D, and to do that I need to think like the main character of the story. Right now this character is stuck at point C and I have to decide what this person would do to get from C to D and remain true to the characterization I've created thus far. I know what I want point D to be but I may have written myself into a corner trying to get there.

^[80] Writing a story that is based on historical or technical facts will also require a great deal of thought if one wants to be historically or technically accurate so as not to detract from the story as a whole. So I guess the answer to the question is that it depends on the story and what I feel is required to make it work for the reader.

INTERVIEWER:
^[81] Tell me about your parents.

DAMON:
^[82] Both pillars of strength, particularly my father. He had to put up with raising six girls. My mother is my best friend.

INTERVIEWER:
^[83] When someone walks into your bedroom, what are the first five things that they're likely to notice?

DAMON:
^[84] An unmade bed, sexy Marilyn Monroe portrait, antique furniture, coziness, and down-to-earthiness.

INTERVIEWER:
^[85] Do you feel in control of your writing, or do your inspiration or characters carry you away?

DAMON:
^[86] I'm always in control. They are mine, all mine and I can do with them what I will. Although sometimes they do talk back and tell me they don't like where I'm taking them. I'll usually try to accommodate them.

INTERVIEWER:
^[87] If you consider yourself to have a muse, what exactly do you mean?

DAMON:
^[88] Some little being in my subconscious that plays videos in my mind from which I can extract characters: the way they look, the way they talk, and what they would do in certain situations. Sometimes these flashes are so short I can barely detect them and at times like this I curse my muse for giving me too little to work with. Other times the video just runs on and on. This is when the stories really flow and my muse is my best friend.

INTERVIEWER:
^[89] Tell the truth, are you your favorite writer, or in your own top five? Why or why not?

DAMON:
^[90] Of course. If I weren't, I wouldn't write, I'd just read other people's work instead. As it is, I have to read my own work, criticize my own writing, learn through my own mistakes, and make my own writing better through this process. If I didn't think I was worth it, why bother.

INTERVIEWER:
^[91] Would the world be a better place if women ran it or would it be basically the same?

DAMON:
^[92] Maybe a bit more compassionate overall, but not a whole lot different. Of course there's always that monthly event to worry about but as long as we're all on a different cycle we should be all right.

INTERVIEWER:
^[93] What is your favorite spot where you live now?

DAMON:
^[94] I have a secret place near a lake beneath a bough of evergreens where I like to sit and think. It's secluded, somewhat protected from weather, and often the waterfowl will swim right up to me and not even realize I'm there. It's very peaceful, a great place to gather one's thoughts.

INTERVIEWER:
^[95] What books are you reading now?

DAMON:
^[96] I'm currently rereading The Killer Angels by Michael Shaara. I've always been intrigued by anything Civil War and the author does a superb job of recreating the sites, sounds, smells, and feelings that make the battle of Gettysburg simply come to life for me.

INTERVIEWER:
^[97] What would your friends say is your worst trait?

DAMON:
^[98] Impatience.

INTERVIEWER:
^[99] Do you type with your fingers on the right keys?

DAMON:
^[100] Nope, I'm sort of a hunter/pecker. That didn't sound right, did it? Oh well.

INTERVIEWER:
^[101] What is the longest any plant in your home has been with you?

DAMON:
^[102] I'm looking at one right now that's been with me for about twelve years. Its name is Jacob, and I'm not quite sure what kind of a plant it is.

INTERVIEWER:
^[103] Do you have any particular bedtime rituals that you follow every night?

DAMON:
^[104] Nope, just strip off all my clothes and dive in.

INTERVIEWER:
^[105] If you find a spider in the bathtub, do you help it out or squish it?

DAMON:
^[106] A spider anywhere in my house is a dead spider. They aren't on any endangered species list and I've always thought they were going to take over the world anyway. Sounds harsh I know but I am the master of my domain and there's nothing I hate more than getting out of bed in the morning and feeling that fine wisp of web brush across my face.

INTERVIEWER:
^[107] What was the last thing you bought that you didn't need?

DAMON:
^[108] Jeff Gordon (NASCAR racing) die cast collectibles. I used to say I didn't understand how people could get so excited about watching a bunch of people tool around in circles in a car trying to beat each other to the finish line. Now I love it! Who knows, maybe it's a psychological replacement of the excitement I'll miss from watching Xena kick 30-40 guys' b*tts at one time.

INTERVIEWER:
^[109] Have you ever smoked cigarettes?

DAMON:
^[110] Yes, for about 18 years. Quit cold turkey about 10 years ago. Good for me!

INTERVIEWER:
^[111] Who is your favorite Greek God?

DAMON:
^[112] Ares, because he's so real and up front, nothing false about that guy. Evil is as evil does.

INTERVIEWER:
^[113] Why do fools fall in love?

DAMON:
^[114] Fools don't fall in love.

INTERVIEWER:
^[115] Do you keep a diary?

DAMON:
^[116] Nope, it's all in my head. Don't want that information ever to fall into the wrong hands.

INTERVIEWER:
^[117] How has online writing affected your life and how you see yourself, your goals?

DAMON:
^[118] It's made me realize that I really do have a way with the written word, and that with a little more practice, I may actually be pretty good.

INTERVIEWER:
^[119] What skill would you like to have that you don't have now?

DAMON:
^[120] Woodworking. I'd love to be able to create things from wood.

INTERVIEWER:
^[121] Who is your real life hero and why?

DAMON:
^[122] My mother. Because she exists in innate strength and beauty, and therefore so do I.

INTERVIEWER:
^[123] What fan fiction story touched you so much that you still remember it vividly?

DAMON:
^[124] Beyond and Forever by Pallas. That story haunted me for days after reading it and still sticks with me. One of the most gut wrenching and saddest, if not the saddest fan fiction stories I've ever read.

INTERVIEWER:
^[125] If you could only choose a single climate with no variation, would you prefer it to be sweltering hot or freezing cold?

DAMON:
^[126] I think I'd prefer the cold. At least if you get cold you can put more clothes on. If it's too hot, you only have so many layers you can remove.

INTERVIEWER:
^[127] What is the first thing you notice about someone when you meet them?

DAMON:
^[128] Their eyes, and whether or not they look me in mine. The eyes truly are the windows to someone's soul.

INTERVIEWER:
^[129] How is $25 well spent?

DAMON:
^[130] A bottle of wine, a blanket, a special someone, a quiet place, and a beautiful sunset.

INTERVIEWER:
^[131] Would you rather live in a sociable suburb, or alone in the deep woods?

DAMON:
^[131] I've always been a bit of a loner and love to commune with nature. We have an understanding, Mother Nature and I. So I guess I'd have to choose the deep woods - with an option to visit the sociable suburb occasionally.

INTERVIEWER:
^[132] What literary character did you most identify with as a child?

DAMON:
^[133] Huckleberry Finn

INTERVIEWER:
^[134] What is the source of your inspiration?

DAMON:
^[135] Life.

INTERVIEWER:
^[136] Where do your ideas come from?

DAMON:
^[137] Life.

INTERVIEWER:
^[138] What do you find most satisfying about your job?

DAMON:
^[139] Any task well done.

INTERVIEWER:
^[140] What are the three things you enjoy most about writing?

DAMON:
^[141] Escaping, creating, and being appreciated.

INTERVIEWER:
^[142] What were your favorite book, TV show, and movie when you were a teenager and what do you think of them now?

DAMON:
^[143] My favorite book was Jonathan Livingston Seagull and I still think it's one of the greatest 'novels' ever written. In about 100 pages, Richard Bach manages to present, in a unique fashion through the eyes of a seagull, the basic essence of what life is all about -- learning to live for yourself. My favorite TV show was Twilight Zone, and I still think Rod Serling was a genius. My favorite movie was The Way We Were; it can still make me cry as much as it did back then.

INTERVIEWER:
^[144] What's your idea of a perfect world?

DAMON:
^[145] Peaceful, environmentally sound, and with no strife, pestilence, or famine.

INTERVIEWER:
^[146] How real is your fiction to you?

DAMON:
^[147] Many times my fiction is a reflection of what I may be feeling at the time I write it. Since I derive a lot of my inspiration and ideas from life in general, I guess that would make it real to me.

INTERVIEWER:
^[148] What Disney character do you most identify with and why?

DAMON:
^[149] Tasmanian Devil. Is that a Disney character? [No, it is a Warner Brother's character]

INTERVIEWER:
^[150] Who do you read for inspiration?

DAMON:
^[151] I read the Bible for inspiration. As far as authors go, I'd say Anne Perry. She's got a keen sense for creating a period setting through description so that I am drawn into the story and feel as though I'm there with the characters, experiencing what they are experiencing.

INTERVIEWER:
^[152] What's your favorite website?

DAMON:
^[153] Mine, of course! Actually, I can't really limit my favorite to just one, there are so many. Mainly I enjoy the fan fiction indexes as a source for great new stories. I think these sites do a great service to both readers and writers, and they should be commended for all the hard work they put in to managing these sites.

INTERVIEWER:
^[154] When you were a kid, what did you want to be when you grew up?

DAMON:
^[155] Racecar driver or a cowboy.

INTERVIEWER:
^[156] What are the limits in sacrifices for true love?

DAMON:
^[157] Loss of self.

INTERVIEWER:
^[158] If you could interview your favorite author, what questions would you ask?

DAMON:
^[159] Probably all the questions I'm answering here, except for the turnip fetish question. Why? Because I'd want to know.

INTERVIEWER:
^[160] What makes a great kisser?

DAMON:
^[161] Patience, gentleness, and true passion.

INTERVIEWER:
^[162] What have you learned from your animals?

DAMON:
^[163] Patience, tolerance, and how to cough up hairballs.

INTERVIEWER:
^[164] Does our society glorify violence to the point we have become desensitized to it and the consequences?

DAMON:
^[165] I don't know that we 'glorify' it, but I do think that it has pervaded our culture to the extent that it must have an adverse effect on the psyches of our children. It must be very difficult and frightening to be a child today who is being bombarded with violence in the news, TV shows, music, and in the streets. But have we become more violent as a society because of the media bombardment or is the media representing society? I tend to think that the decay of the family unit has a lot to do with it.

INTERVIEWER:
^[166] What is your motto?

DAMON:
^[167] Just do it!

INTERVIEWER:
^[168] What do you think we take too seriously as writers?

DAMON:
^[169] Negative criticism. Expect it, accept it with grace, learn from it, and move on.

Kristien's Stories

Foibles and Follies, The Misadventures of the Warrior and Bard Series

No.1 If At First You Don't Succeed
Comedy. A string of bad luck, which hinders Xena and Gabrielle from being 'reacquainted' after a warrior-hunting trip, caused great anxiety and trouble for the entire Amazon nation.

No.2 Simple Pleasures
Comedy. Xena goes on a fishing adventure and bring home a new friend. Meanwhile, Gabrielle amuses herself as she waits for the warrior's return. The Amazons get a surprise.

No.3 Attention Shoppers
Comedy. Xena and Gabrielle go on a shopping adventure and wind up getting more than they bargained for.

No.4 Beware The Green-Eyed Monster
Comedy. Jealousy reigns in this Xena/Gabrielle adventure leading to some hysterical encounters.

No.5 No Room At The Doghouse, Er...Inn
Comedy. Xena and Gabrielle meet up with Hercules on their way to Athens, Xena has to make some tough choices, and several 'hair-raising' encounters ensue.

Other Stories

Do You Know?
Vignette drama. Gabrielle's thoughts and feeling during the last moments before the crucifixion in IDES OF MARCH.

FANtasy
In this fantasy within a fantasy story, Xena and Gabrielle realize they are soul mates, bound together forever, after some not so gentle urging by an odd couple of friends.

Fetish
Comedy. Xena finds herself in an awkward situation when she's overcome with a strange obsession in this little story written just for fun as part of a bard's challenge.

The Gift
Solstice Story. Xena goes shopping for a solstice surprise for Gabrielle and meets an archenemy in the marketplace that ends up giving the bard the biggest surprise of all.

Hope And Light
Drama. Xena lies near death but finds hope, in many ways.

It's In The Subtext, Gabrielle
Comedy. While apart, Gabrielle and Xena exchange a series of letters in which new feelings are explored and finally realized.

My Weakness Is My Strength/b>
Drama. In this tale, formerly titled For Love Of A Warrior, Xena and Gabrielle are traveling to Athens when the bard has a nightmarish premonition and in the end realizes that dreams really can come true.

Love Me Now, Forever
Vignette drama. A never-ending love story.

Mr. Turnip Head Rides Again
Baby Eve gets a new toy with a bit of history and it takes Xena and Gabrielle by surprise, not to mention on a trip down memory lane.

My Source, My Soul
Drama. After a tragic accident, a young woman finds hope and the will to live through the never-ending love of and for her soulmate, and a very special child.

Now
Plot, What Plot. An erotic encounter in the middle of an Amazon wedding ceremony.

Teach Me Everything You Know
Drama. A sad yet hope-filled story in which one of our heroes dies leaving the other to deal with her passing.

Togetherness
An amusing little day in the life tale.

The Truest Warrior
A young and unsure-of-herself Amazon Princess is put in charge of saving the Amazon hunting grounds from a marauding warlord.

When Pigs Fly!
Comedy. This follow-up to Fetish finds Xena and Gabrielle battling a familiar foe and under attack by flying pork.

Acknowledgments

Thanks to Kamouraskan for the beta.

Articles

L. J. Maas and Murphy Wilson [Amy Murphy]. One Step Beyond ... Uber, That Is. WHOOSH #49 (October 2000)

The "Inside the Head of…" series in Whoosh issues #58, 61-

Biography

Amy Murphy
Thirty-one-year-old Amy Murphy resides in Indiana, and is an avid reader of Xena: Warrior Princess Fan Fiction. If it exists in the Xenaverse, chances are she's read it! Murphy has also tried her hand at writing fan fiction, turning out two very nice pieces that reside on a couple of web sites throughout the Xenaverse.

Favorite episode: IS THERE A DOCTOR IN THE HOUSE
Favorite line: "I have many skills" (various episodes)
First episode seen: THE TITANS (07/107)
Least favorite episode: LYRE, LYRE HEARTS ON FIRE (100/510)