Whoosh! Issue 40 - January 2000


The Words, The Lines, The Action




LIGHTS! CAMERAS!! ACTION!!!

"Light it!"
Callisto re: the rope from which Gabrielle is hanging
CALLISTO

Before the surgeon general's warnings.

Callisto has a hard time avoiding fire


"Burn her!"
Callisto re: Gabrielle in the cave
RETURN OF CALLISTO

"Burn it down!"
Talmadeus' men re: factory housing the seltzer
THE GREATER GOOD

"Burn them both."
Apex re: the king and Gabrielle
BLIND FAITH

"Torch the city and everything in it."
King Menelaus re: Troy
BEWARE GREEKS

"Take her up!"
Callisto re: Gabrielle
THE GREATER GOOD

"Bite her!"
Bacchus to Bacchae re: Xena
GIRLS JUST WANNA HAVE FUN

"Chain 'em up."
Callisto re: Joxer
CALLISTO

"Chain 'em up."
Xena re: the Hordite
THE PRICE

"Do it!"
Xena to Darius re: pushing the arrow all the way through her
CHARIOTS OF WAR
Xena to Gabrielle re: getting as far away as possible
THE RECKONING
Atrius to Xena re: stopping Kirilus' army
TIES THAT BIND
Callisto to Joxer re: killing Gabrielle
CALLISTO
Xena to Toris re: killing Cortese
DEATH MASK
soldier to Xena re: amputating his leg
Ephiny to Xena re: Caesarean childbirth
IS THERE A DOCTOR IN THE HOUSE?
Xena to Gabrielle re: biting her neck
GIRLS JUST WANNA HAVE FUN
Gabrielle to Xena re: getting Callisto
RETURN OF CALLISTO
Agis to Meg re: killing King Lias
WARRIOR ... PRINCESS ... TRAMP
Ares to Xena re: striking the eye of Ephestus to set him free
THE XENA SCROLLS
Gabrielle to Xena re: going to the lava rocks
Gabrielle to Xena re: cutting the rope over the lava pit
A NECESSARY EVIL
Meleager to Gabrielle re: writing his last will and testament
THE EXECUTION
Xena to Menticles re: getting unarmed volunteers to go with her
Xena to Menticles re: cutting the ropes binding a Hordite's wrist
THE PRICE
Vasculis to sailor re: cutting the main mast line
Poseidon to Cecrops re: cutting the rope which would plunge Xena into the sea
LOST MARINER

"Give me that!"
Xena to Gabrielle re: Agranon's medallion
THE PATH NOT TAKEN
Xena as she snatches the knife from Celano
HOOVES AND HARLOTS

Early depilatory.

Celano's knife was the telling clue as to who the real murderers of Terreis were.



Thersites to Xena re: the pouch containing a clue
A FISTFUL OF DINARS
Xena as she snatches a knife from Joxer
GIRLS JUST WANNA HAVE FUN
Callisto to Gabrielle re: the ambrosia
A NECESSARY EVIL

"Archers!"
Cycnus' men re: Xena after she rescues Solon
CHARIOTS OF WAR
Trojan soldiers
BEWARE GREEKS
Dagnine's men re: Xena after she rescues Lykus
ORPHAN OF WAR
Velasca re: Autolycus
THE QUEST

"Charge!"
Dagon to his army
GIANT KILLER

"Attack!!"
soldier re: the orphanage
A SOLSTICE CAROL
Ephiny to the Amazons re: Velasca
A NECESSARY EVIL

Breasts Attack!!!

Amazons, ATTACK!



Mercer to his soldiers re: the Horde
THE PRICE

"Take the village!!!"
Xena
ALTARED STATES

"Retreat!"
Kalus
THE GREATER GOOD
Malik
DEATH MASK
Dagnine
ORPHAN OF WAR
Amazons
A NECESSARY EVIL
Mercer
THE PRICE

"Everybody, out!"
Xena to villagers at the meeting
CHARIOTS OF WAR
Gabrielle to the villagers in the cave
THE ROYAL COUPLE OF THIEVES
Malik to his men
DEATH MASK
Priest after the Dagger of Helios falls
THE QUEST

"Everyone, to the temple!"
Xena to virgins and Gabrielle
A COMEDY OF EROS

"To the trees!"
Ephiny to the Amazons
HOOVES AND HARLOTS

"To the horses!"
Xena to the Israelites
GIANT KILLER

"To the cave!"
David to the Israelites
GIANT KILLER

"Go away!"
Xena's mother to Xena
SINS OF THE PAST
Thersites to Gabrielle when they first meet
Thersites to Xena around the campfire
A FISTFUL OF DINARS
Malik to Toris
DEATH MASK
Callisto as Xena to the ghosts of the people she killed
INTIMATE STRANGER

Gee, your hair smells terrific.

Xena, although still in Callisto's body at the end of INTIMATE STRANGER,
finds time to make up with Gabrielle.



Velasca to Xena at the lava pit
A NECESSARY EVIL
The little man to Xena
THE EXECUTION

"After them!"
Cycnus' men re: the villagers
CHARIOTS OF WAR
Apex's men re: Xena and Palaemon
BLIND FAITH
Draco's men re: the virgins
A COMEDY OF EROS

"After her!"
Mezentius re: Xena
THE PATH NOT TAKEN
The villagers re: Xena
THE RECKONING
Villagers re: Xena
DEATH IN CHAINS
Vasculis re: Xena
LOST MARINER

"Seize her!"
"Seize them!"
soldiers re: King Silvus and the 2nd Fate
A SOLSTICE CAROL
Caesar's men re: Xena
DESTINY
Apex re: Gabrielle
BLIND FAITH

"Get her!"
Nemos to soldiers re: Xena
CRADLE OF HOPE
Mezentius re: Xena
THE PATH NOT TAKEN
Hesiod to his men re: Xena
THE TITANS
Toxeus' men re: Xena
DEATH IN CHAINS
Deiphobus' men re: Xena
Paris re: Xena
BEWARE GREEKS
Background voice re: Xena after Atyminius said he smelled
'mortality' and then pointed to her
MORTAL BELOVED
Talmadeus' men re: Xena
Gabrielle
THE GREATER GOOD
Dagnine re: Xena
ORPHAN OF WAR
Dagon re: Xena
GIANT KILLER
Bacchus to Bacchae re: Xena
GIRLS JUST WANNA HAVE FUN
Jailer re: Callisto
Callisto's men re: Gabrielle
Gabrielle to Xena re: Callisto
RETURN OF CALLISTO
Agis re: Princess Diana
WARRIOR ... PRINCESS ... TRAMP
Xena's men re: M'Lila
DESTINY
Amazons re: Velasca
A NECESSARY EVIL
Draco's men re: one of the virgins
A COMEDY OF EROS

"Eat this!"
Xena to the Harpy re: fire
MORTAL BELOVED

Tastes like chicken.

An unfortunate harpy eating "this".


"Get back."
Xena to villagers
THE RECKONING
Xena to villagers
THE EXECUTION

"Stand back!"
Xena to the dead in her dreamscape
DREAMWORKER
Xena to the villagers
THE RECKONING
Xena to the villagers as she protected Gabrielle
THE EXECUTION
Xena to Menticles after the Hordite's wrist restraints were cut loose
THE PRICE

"Pick up the sword!"
Manus to Gabrielle
DREAMWORKER

"Open the gates!"
Perdicus
BEWARE GREEKS

"Open the gates!"
Xena
THE PRICE

"I did it!"
Meleager re: successfully defending Podedia
THE PRODIGAL
Gabrielle to Xena re: catching a fish
ALTARED STATES
Gabrielle to Xena re: stopping a dart with her staff
DEATH MASK
Senticles re: going down a chimney
A SOLSTICE CAROL
Joxer to Xena re: finding Cupid
A COMEDY OF EROS

"Do what I say!!!"
Xena to Gabrielle re: swimming ashore
THE PRICE

"If you let me go, I will dedicate my life to killing everything you love - your friends, your family, your reputation, even your horse!"
Callisto to Xena
CALLISTO

"I'll kill Xena! I'll kill Hercules!! I'll take Athens!!!"
Dagnine
ORPHAN OF WAR

The Centaur's centaur

Be careful with the Ixion Stone.
The least of its problems is that it turns you into an ugly Centaur.




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